*Spoiler warning for DC’s Legends of Tomorrow season 4, episode 14.

Constantine's ancestor on Legends of Tomorrow

Constantine’s ancestor on Legends of Tomorrow. Photo courtesy of the CW, screenshot by Linda Maleh.

It’s another weird episode of Legends of Tomorrow, with Gary having a cursed nipple, and Ray taken over by Neron. The episode starts with Constantine having been captured by Neron (it’s unclear to me when/how that happened), and the two of them traveling through the icy landscape of The Ice Age. Neron tells Constantine that he needs him to open a portal to hell to bring his beloved Tabitha to Earth. Constantine refuses, and then the Legends show up. They prepare to fire on Neron, even if it means destroying Constantine and Ray in the process (Constantine is on board for this plan), but Sara hesitates. The whole thing seems to easy. Mick does not have Sara’s intuition, and tells Gideon to fire. She does, Neron and Constantine disappear before the blast can hit them, and the blast results in an avalanche, burying the ship. The whole thing was a trap to neutralize the Legends.

So, if Mick had just listened to Sara, they wouldn’t be in this mess, but they are, and what’s worse, they’re seriously stuck. They don’t have enough power to blast out of the snow and ice, and if things continue like this, they’re going to freeze and starve to death down there. They turn off all unnecessary power to conserve energy for life support, and pull on jackets, but tensions are running high. They call for help at the Time Bureau, but no one answers, since the Bureau is going through its own problems right now. (I would like to point out that this could’ve been fixed if the Legends had time watches like the rest of the Bureau, and didn’t solely rely on the ship to time travel.)

Mona thinks it’s strange when Ava assigns Gary to do everyone’s performance reviews, although it seems news of his betrayal hasn’t spread yet. When she confronts Ava, Ava responds that “Gary Green is all the man we need,” which is extra strange. Mona goes to Nora, who is painstakingly filling out her start paperwork at the Bureau, for help. After hearing even more coworkers spout the “Gary Green is all the man we need” line, in a brainwashed fashion, Nora agrees to help. She goes to check out Gary, while Mona tries to contact the Waverider, but since they shut off all non-essential power, they don’t get the call.

Meanwhile, Constantine and Neron go to an ancient Celtic village, where Constantine’s ancestor is the king, and also mysteriously looks exactly like him. Apparently Constantines have been exiling monsters to hell for thousands of years, because this king has been doing it also. He arrives back at the village to proclaim that they found a beast, and are prepared to send it to hell at a ritual that night. Neron says though, that it was this king that created the rift between humans and magical creatures, and that he’s only doing it instill fear in his people so that he can consolidate power over them. Constantine argues the Neron must be wrong, but when the king shows the beast to everyone, Constantine recognizes it as a Puca, which is a peaceful creature. He tries to reason with the king, but the king knocks him out, arrests him, and plans to send both Constantine and the Puca to hell.

Back on the ship, Zari and Nate find that the heat lamp they set up to keep their dragon egg warm is failing due to the lack of power. They decide to take turns keeping the egg – which Nate named Wuxtible – under their shirts, so that it gets skin-to-skin contact. They also have sex, with the egg between them, which is interesting. The funniest part is that even though they just started dating last week, they’re acting like parents to the egg, so I guess they skipped a few steps.

Sara and Mick look through Ray’s old stuff and find his survival guide. They flip to the “What to do if you’re stuck in an avalanche” portion, but everything it says they’ve already tried. In the guide, it says that if everything fails, they should just enjoy their time together as long as they have left, which gives Sara an idea. She decides that there’s no reason for them to sit there freezing and waiting to die. She tells Gideon to turn the power back on, and tells the Legends that they’re all going to party until they run out of power. This turns out well for them, since they use so much power, the resulting heat is enough to melt the surrounding ice a little bit and shake the ship loose. It’s still a long shot that they’ll be able to blast out of there, but they decide to try, and it works.

Things aren’t going quite as well over at the Bureau. Nora gets brainwashed by Gary, just like everybody else, and traps Mona in a containment cell. She’s then brought to Gary, who tries to hypnotize her with his cursed nipple, which apparently know opens up to be an eyeball, which is super creepy. At that point though, Mona pulls an ace out of her sleeve, and turns into a kaupé. Mona attacks Gary, and Ava and Nora burst in to protect Gary. Mona knocks their heads together, which shakes them loose of the brainwash. Mona then bites off Gary’s nipple – second time this season Gary’s had this happened to him, and pursues him out into the hallway.

Meanwhile, Constantine has to think fast to make sure he and the puca aren’t sent to hell. He winds up using magic so that the portal the king opens up, stabilizes, and doesn’t drag him in, which is exactly what Neron wanted. Constantine then uses magic to free the puca- it’s unclear why he didn’t do that earlier, cuts of the king’s hand, driving him off, and enters into a sword fight with Neron. Constantine’s about to kill Neron when the Legends show up, and tell him not to give up on Ray. Constantine takes their words to heart, and jumps into the portal to hell to go save Ray. Neron then uses the portal to free his Tabitha, who, it turns out, is the fairy godmother from earlier in the season. She and Neron then escape and travel to the Bureau.

They arrive just in time to see Gary being chased by Mona-kaupe. He begs them for help, and Tabitha turns Mona back into her regular human self. The three take Mona prisoner, and head off. Ava escapes and goes to the Waverider, but Nora stays behind to try to free Mona. Ava updates the Legends on what’s going on, and they all decide to make a plan to defeat Neron and save Ray.

This episode has a lot of parts, and some work better than others. The Legends partying to get free from an avalanche is very on brand. Gary using his cursed nipple to “nip-notize” everyone at the Bureau is hysterical, and the epitome of Legends crazy. I didn’t love the Constantine story line though. For one thing, how did he get captured by Neron? Why does he have exactly the same face as his ancestor from over 2,000 years ago? Why didn’t he use magic to escape a million times? Ray as Neron also isn’t working for me. The actor, Brandon Routh, just doesn’t play evil so well. He’s a lot better at playing lovable and goofy Ray. Tabitha turning out to be the fairy godmother is just weird, and not in a good way. I also don’t care about Nate and Zari’s dragon egg, which just seems shoe-horned in.

With two episodes left to go of the season there are some things I can’t wait to see. I’m looking forward to Nora kicking Neron’s ass. I’m curious as to how this Gary story line is going to shake out, since the character used to be so sweet. True, the nipple was making him do bad things, but even before that, Gary allied with Neron all on his own, so he’s going to have to reckon with that. I’m wondering how Constantine is going to pull Ray out of hell. Mostly, I think Ava, Nora, and the Legends are going to make a great team to face this threat, providing for an awesome end to the season.