It figures that the moment I finally remember Maggie’s name she gets killed off.

Supernatural returns weeks after their touching 300th episode (I don’t care what anyone says, John Winchester is a good character, if not always a good father), hopping right back into the Michael arc!

Ouroboros, in case you were wondering, is a snake eating itself. It’s fitting for this season of Supernatural overall, but I would be lying if I didn’t say I still enjoy the meal. The episode follows the boys as they chase Noah, a Gorgon with a pet snake named Felix, and a cookbook for people-meat, so let’s dig in!

The main plot of the episode isn’t really about Noah, though he and his mad skills in the kitchen are what we see first. He’s frying up some liver and pasta, and he plucks out a shockingly unrealistic eyeball from the dean man on the counter. His ocular hors d’œuvre serves as both a delicious (ew, Noah, I guess) amuse bouche, as well as a means with which to peek into the future to see Dean and Sam. Spying the Winchesters hot on his heels, and not thrilled with dinner being interrupted, Noah, Felix, and the second eyeball ditch the dinner party early. It makes me wonder how many people died simply because Noah can’t finish a damn meal without the Winchesters coming. Ahhh, but when time catches up, the boys plus Cas and Jack break into the house, frustrated as try and fail to catch the monster of the week. They were too late, even with the help of Rowena’s tracking spell. Cas for some reason thinks he can save a guy whose literal chest is splayed open, and we learn that the team has been chasing this guy for weeks and are always one step behind.

Once they head back to what I can only assume at this point is a whole block of rooms (the team is getting delightfully crowded), Sam and a very curious Rowena do some research, while Dean, Cas, and Jack grab a bite to eat. We finally get a few minutes of the Righteous Man and Angel of the Lord having some Real Talk™ about the shit Dean is dealing with. Cas asks how Dean’s doing, and tells him that even functioning is a Herculean feat. Dean admits that Michael’s pounding is wearing on him. He tells his bestie that he’s not sleeping because he must always keep his guard up, and asks for assurances that Plan B is still on, should anything happen.

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If you’re wondering why they would have such an intimate chat in front of their kid, the answer is: they wouldn’t. Jack is in the bathroom coughing up blood that he’s not telling anyone about and using Ricola’s new soul-flavored lozenges (available only through Lily Sunder’s Apothecary) to quiet the hacking. So I guess the answer to the age old question is: nurture, since Jack is going through some shit and pretending he’s not. The Winchester Way!

Cas suggests that maybe it’s a human, not a monster cannibalizing people, since there is a ritualistic element to the killings, to which Jack helpfully replies that the killer is a monster, no matter what. I’d hate to disagree with over a decade of canon or anything, but we don’t call other species monsters for just doing what they do, and all the monsters in the show are doing is trying to eat and survive, whereas the humans tend to do it for the pleasure and whatnot, so who is really the “monster,” hmmm?

Rowena and Sam call them back and tell them that they’re hunting a Gorgon, a flesh eating snake fan who gorges every few months and who can only be killed with a silver decapitation. They also mention that the eyeball thing is to get a glimpse of the future, hence never being able to catch him.

Meanwhile, Noah is at a truckstop offering to turn tricks for a ride. The poor trucker who takes him up on the offer probably was planning something more fun than being poisoned and enucleated. Alas, twasn’t a love connection and the next morning Dean and Cas show at the crime scene in their FBI garb. The cop tells them there was a note left for a “Dean” on the body, which, yikes. The note warns Dean, Sam, and Rowena off, but makes no mention of Cas (to his chagrin) or Jack. Sam has a more positive view on this development, however, and sees Cas and Jack as their way to catch Noah.

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Part of their scheme involves turning Jack into a dog and taking him to the vet, since Rowena needs antivenom in order to make an antidote to the Gorgon’s venom. Honestly, I could watch just an hour of Sam and Rowena’s hijinks with Jack the pupper. He’s a very cute pupper, and RowRow relishes her role of “misunderstood girlfriend of a giant.” Jack gets a thermometer up the pup butt, but snags the antivenom. Rowena mentions the hinkiness of “How Jack’s Alive” and tells Sam she’s worried about the magic being used on the kid. Sam tells her in a super convincing way not to worry and they’re off.

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While the team is working on their plan, Noah is full on monologuing to his next victim. When asked why he’s killing innocent men and eating them, Noah replies that he used to hunt women too, but they’ve become much more cautious in recent years due to the overall shittiness of the Patriarchy, so I guess yay for us? Noah is telling his forced friend that he’s not a fan of eating people, since we’re bland and there aren’t many ways to cook us (damn Allrecipes for their poor selection!) but hey, a demi-god’s gotta eat, when Cas bursts in, ready to rumble, shortly followed by Jack. Noah tells Jack the story of the chicken and the snake, and the sacrifices one makes to kill their enemies, and plants a little seed in Jack’s brain about which he’d be. Meanwhile, Cas is ready to fight, but when he and Noah go head-to-head, Cas gets a smooch and he’s down for the count. Of course.

Soon enough the bros join the party, and Noah hits Sam a couple times before beating the shit outta Dean, knocking him unconscious. Eek! Before he can get away, however, Jack cuts his head off. Go team! Alas, the antivenom doesn’t revive Cas, so Jack uses his powers to heal him and they rush to the bunker.

Once they get back to the bunker, Sam tells Maggie about Dean’s head injury (and I’m assuming hours’ worth of unconsciousness)… and Maggie rushes off to get ice, which is basically the perfect analogy for this character: an afterthought who gets the least helpful thing to help when it’s already too late. Cas can’t heal Dean or see what’s going on in his noggin, which is a bad sign, and Jack offers his magic to help Dean, going to his room to brood when he’s refused.

In Jack’s room, we get a lovely moment between him and Cas, during which Cas tells Jack that humans are only around for a finite amount of time, and though they love them, Cas and Jack must accept that there will be plenty of living for them long after the hunters are gone, and to cherish them while Cas and Jack can. The moment is interrupted by a screaming Dean, who tells them that Michael is gone… and that revelation is interrupted by yet another scream!

Says the guy who literally defied Heaven and Hell to save the Winchesters… Image Courtesy of CW

The team heads to the War Room to find all of the AU hunters dead, and arrive just in time to see Maggie die. Turns out Michael forced Rowena to let him in and then killed everyone. Michael plays with his toys (aka TFW) for a little while, and it turns out to be his undoing, as Jack uses his power to overcome Michael, free Rowena, and kill the archangel before consuming his Grace.

Image Courtesy of CW

Unlike the killing of Lucifer, however, there is no joyful celebration at this, other than Jack’s smile and declaration that he’s “Me again” and I can’t help but remember reading that Michael isn’t going to be the season’s big bad.

Overall I really enjoyed this episode. I can’t say I’m sorry to see the AU hunters go, since, other than Bobby and Charlie, I only barely remembered one of them. It’s another storyline that had a lot of unused potential, and at least this was a clean end to it. I think the fact that this entire season the AU hunters are either running around in a group like some paranormal Keystone Cops or sitting on their asses playing cards (because there are no monsters anywhere unless Dean and Sam are hunting them??) proves that the writers have no idea of how to write for a cast larger than five people. Steve Yockey usually does a good job writing TFW and this episode is no exception, although I was ready to throw hands if anything happened to Rowena while she was possessed by Michael. It was refreshing to see Dean confide in Cas about his struggles, seeing the two friends interacting has been sorely lacking for the past few seasons, and so any time we get with their dynamic is important. Also, please give me a spin-off about Rowena’s life when the boys aren’t around, and I promise I will someday think about forgiving the CW for not picking up Wayward Sisters.

What did you think of Ouroboros? The the eye thing freak you out as much as it did me?? Because seriously, eyeballs and teeth are like… give me shivers gross for me.