Last week, Mindy was bad with money in an excuse to get Cristin Milioti back; Jeremy was a creepy lothario again, Jody was gross, Tamra was queen and Leo made a tiny appearance
The episode starts off with Jeremy trying to lead a staff meeting but the new tenants are making a LOT of construction noise and no one is listening. His new girlfriend is popping by for a visit and he wants everyone to show her with the same respect they show Tamra (not Jeremy level of respect because that’s very low and would definitely offend his girlfriend/anyone with ears. As the meeting is coming to a close, the ceiling collapses a little and water splashes everywhere. If you need a fun activity this week, watch this scene and slow it down to study the various reactions to the water.
Mindy, Jeremy, & Jody head upstairs to deal with these noisy nellies (is that a thing, it doesn’t feel like a thing) only to find out that it’s Whitney’s new hedge fund! She barely remembers Jeremy or Jody probably because of all the coke she was doing at the time, and tells them that she’ll pay for the damages to the ceiling but the construction is “only” 14 weeks which is much less annoying than a lifetime of crying baby noises.
Jody, in his infinite sexist-ness, wants to make the Lahiri Fertility Clinic more manly to put the patients more at ease…barf. Mindy agrees to go grandfather clock shopping with him to shut him up. Dr. K notices she’s writing herself a reminder note on the back of an un-deposited paycheck and decides to lecture her some more about the state of her finances. Mindy, apparently, had always delegated the money stuff to her dad or Danny because thinking about the future is terrifying (same girl). She bitches at Jody to stop lecturing her and thankfully he leaves.
Mindy being Mindy, she goes to the Shulman gang to see if they have their financial futures in order. It turns out, everyone is doing smart things with their money, Tamra keeps hers in a mutual fund, Colette is a trust fund kid, etka. Mindy wants to go to Whitney for help but Jeremy suggests a “simpleton’s guide” from the bookstore.
GUYS! Jeremy’s girlfriend is here! And she’s slightly older so Jody is super weirded out by it because he sucks. They met while doing a Scottish play – Shrek The Musical – and are deeply in love. Jeremy says her soul is blended into his own (the same way Morgan feels about Grandma). Colette tells Jody to get over himself because he’s “OLD AS HELL” and when they were little she thought he was her secret dad (eeuuuh okaaay). Tamra, being the queen, points out the double standard and shuts everyone up.
Back at Mindy’s apartment, she gets out a mexican energy drink and her Suze Orman book (that I’m pretending Danny bought her for a birthday or anniversary at some point) . The book literally terrifies her with scary words about finances so she throws it across the room and decides to go to Whitney for help.
You gotta admire her dedication to always looking fabulous, because Mindy changes out of her pyjamas and into a knit skirt/vest ensemble to go see Whitney with her box of bills. While she’s there, she learns that Whitney got sober recently but hasn’t told anyone, so she chains herself to her desk to keep from getting her sniff on with her coworkers. Whit feels sad and friendless so sweet Mindy is like “I could be your friend” and then Whit is so happy she agrees to be Min’s money guy, and also she wants to hang out like right now. Mindy calls Jody to bail on the lame clock shopping plans and tells him she’s on a date to get him off her back.
Back at the hospital the next day, all the nurses are swooning over what a good guy Dr. Reed is after they see him with Juliette. But Queen Tamra is verrrrrrry suspicious of the whole thing after she sees him flirting with some nurses two seconds after Juliette leaves.
Apparently, Mindy and Whitney had a sleepover and cyber bullied Morgan on Facebook – the best time ever. Whit is now understandably addicted to Mindy and wants to hang out later that day at 5pm because 5:10 is the 4:20 of cocaine. There’s an adorable friendship montage set to Lilly Allen (‘duh) of board games and puzzles and paintball and drones. That’s a lot of activity in one week but at least they got to stay indoors and not wear real pants (probably).
A week later at work, Mindy is sleeping at her desk. Morgan aggressively wakes her up because he’s just jealous that he can’t sleep at his desk. He’s also mad that she told Jody she was dating someone instead of telling him. Mindy comes clean about hanging out with Whitney. Morgan freaks out because Whit is a drug addict but Mindy reassures him that she’s addicted to spending time with her now, which like, who isn’t. As she’s getting rid of Morgan because his story is boring and she’s busy, it occurs to her that she can just use that excuse on Whitney. They send some passive aggressive texts (mostly from Whitney) and Mindy is free of the Whitney hangout.
I don’t understand how all the men on this show think they are more important to Mindy than her job. Last season, Danny was mad that she was late to the movies and never late for a procedure, now Jody is mad that she bailed on clocks but this hysterectomy was important enough to show up to. Which like, duh guys – her job is more important than you old grumps. But I digress, He starts lecturing her again and she’s all “if my life stresses you out so much maybe you should care less; I don’t care about you […].” and storms off into surgery! #SlayBossBitchMindy
Back at home, Mindy is watching Narcos and decides to check up on Whitney. Turns out, Whitney went to McBarfigans (ew bar name ew) with some guys from work which is a baaaaad idea. Mindy heads down there to save her from herself. She finds her in the bathroom pretending to do drugs. Mindy starts trying to give Whitney advice because it’s crazy that she chains herself to her desk and hides in bathrooms but Whit turns it back around on Mindy, asking her why she can’t take care of her own finances. In a real moment of self awareness, Mindy admits that it’s because she’s scared; she’ll see that she spends too much money on bear claws and all the money that could be put to better use for Leo’s education or her retirement. She confesses that she didn’t sign up for every decision she made to have to be as a single mother. Whitney reassures her that she’s looked at Mindy’s finances and she’s going to be fine.
On the subway, Jody runs into Juliette, and is more gross and sexist. Juliette schools him hard! She asks if he’s in a relationship & he says he’s not because he’s been busy with work and all the new shows (same though). She drops the truth bomb that maybe the people he dates are the opposite of the people that make him happy, reminds him that she’s probably younger than him, and leaves in a cloud of glitter and magic (not really).
At the hospital, Tamra catches Jeremy making out with Nurse Jen, Grey’s Anatomy style. Jeremy says that he hated his reputation and wanted to change it but didn’t want to modify his behaviour so he hired Juliette to play his girlfriend. Queen Tamra is pissed and annoyed that this means Dr. K. was right and storms off.
At the office, Jody is writing an apology letter to Mindy, if we can call it an apology letter. What Juliette said really stuck with him because at the end of the letter, he asks Mindy out…ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew. He jsut decided that the opposite of what he dates is Mindy and I’m honestly so offended by it okay moving on.
The next day, Tamra makes Jeremy confess that the Juliette thing was all fake, fake as his nails. Jody freaks out because he sent that letter to Mindy based on Juliette’s advice but now he realizes it could never work and tries to stop the letter from being sent but tooooo laaaaaaaate bro. I’m hoping this means he’s ruined everything and will quit soon.
That night, Mindy is online banking and finally being her own money guy. Whitney stops by with a bear claw and Mindy asks her to stay, share the pastry (she has two more in her drawer #smart) and hang out. The show ends on a wide shot, where we see Mindy’s office as her and Whit clink the bear claws together and cement their friendship.
I didn’t love this episode like I’ve loved some other ones – though the Cristin Milioti cameo was 100 emoji. See y’all next week for a Mindy Lahiri is DTF recap and don’t forget to livetweet with us tomorrow at 9:30!