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Janelle is back! Photo: © Channel 5. Source: Digital Spy

Last week on Neighbours mostly seemed to revolve around David and Aaron and their terrible foster parenting, so this post is going to be a little bit Brandtt and Emmett-heavy.

Brandtt is a Creep

It’s not like me to be a sweet, naive child, but at first, I thought it was cute that Brandtt (I’m still unsure if he’s called Brad, Brent or Brett) and Harlow had formed a bit of a bond, but then Brandtt ruined it by being a total creep. It turns out he’s one of those guys who thinks people are vending machines that you put nice coins into until eventually, sex falls out, because there can’t possibly be any other reason to be nice to someone other than that you want to sleep with them. He’s extremely aggressive and threatening with Harlow, which immediately gets back to David and Aaron, who hit the roof. 

There’s no doubt that Brandtt’s behaviour is very serious and utterly unacceptable, but I have a bit of a bone to pick with David and Aaron over this one, because their response to it is to pack Brandtt back off to residential care. I understand they’re trying to protect Harlow, but honestly, a more useful approach to this would have been to sit down with Brandtt and have an in-depth conversation about consent, rather than to just phone Layla and say, “This one’s broken, we don’t want it any more.” They’re foster parents – a good number of the kids that are going to come through their door are going to have behavioural problems, none of which are ever going to improve if they just ship them back off to the care home at the first sign of trouble. Now Brandtt will probably go on to do the same thing to another girl. Nice one, David and Aaron.

Brandtt and Emmett’s Mum is Basically Janelle Timmins

Just as Brandtt is getting kicked out of the house because David and Aaron can’t be bothered with him any more, his mum turns up, who is incredibly reminiscent of Janelle Timmins. I kind of hope she sticks around for a bit, because she seems like she might be fun. Terese has already taken her under her wing and got her into a job and an AA meeting. Honestly, Terese is the only capable member of that family. She gets stuff done.

Paul is Officially the Worst

Staying on the subject of David and Aaron and the mess that is the Robinson/Tanaka/Brennan family, Paul really outdid himself in the ‘being a giant tool’ stakes by attempting to bribe Janelle 2.0 to stay away from Emmett, knowing full well she was an alcoholic who was probably going to spend all the money getting absolutely trashed, and without a single thought as to how the whole thing was going to make David and Aaron look to the foster agency.

For a successful businessman, he doesn’t half blunder into a lot of decisions without properly thinking about what the consequences might be. How on earth has Lassiters remained (mostly) solvent for all this time?

Shane Has the Shortest Speed Addiction in World History

I’m sure we’ve not heard the last of this storyline yet, but I am pretty impressed at how physically resilient Shane is after he manages to go through the withdrawal from what sounds like a hefty speed addiction in a single night. He goes cold turkey on his own in a hotel room and still feels like getting down and dirty with Dipi when he comes out the other side the following morning. That’s a pretty impressive bounce back. With energy like that, I’m starting to wonder why he needed the speed in the first place.

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Shane behaving not at all suspiciously. Photo: © Channel 5. Source: Digital Spy

Don’t Go to Aaron for Advice

It’s amazing that anyone would go to Aaron for advice, given the current mess that is his home life, but Chloe does, and it will have come as no surprise to anyone that said advice is absolutely terrible. There’s talk of Nicolette coming to live with Chloe and Pierce in order to help look after Chloe’s mum, and so Chloe spills the beans to Aaron that Nicolette asked her out. Incredibly, Aaron tells her that it’s a great idea to get Nicolette to move in and also, just for good measure, that Chloe shouldn’t bother telling Pierce about Nicolette asking her out. Because none of that is going to backfire horribly, is it? I honestly can’t roll my eyes hard enough. Do better, Brennans.