Winter Olympics? More Like WINCHESTER Olympics!!

The Winter Olympics may have our shows on hiatus, but here at TGON that just means it’s time for the Winchester Olympics!

Meatsuit: Long Program

Gold: Jimmy Novak

Jimmy Novak never intended to be a vessel for long, but we’re going on ten years now that Castiel has been using his meatsuit, with only the briefest break to pop into Claire. Jimmy has been shot, stabbed, exploded, and even harbored the Archangel Lucifer.

Silver: Crowley*

Now, we don’t know the name of the man Crowley has been riding for years, or if it’s just his own body, but we do know it’s been through a lot.

*suspected use of performance enhancing witchcraft, as yet unproven

Bronze: Nick

He may not have lasted terribly long the first time around, but as the preferred vessel of an Archangel as powerful as Lucifer (well, second choice), Nick has somehow endured both in and out of the cage.

 

Meatsuit: Short Program

Gold: Sam Winchester

As the vessel for Lucifer, Sam’s body has the endurance, but he’s never housed an entity for very long. He earns Gold simply by housing so many demons and angels. He’s been home to Lucifer, Gadreel, and briefly Crowley, which gives him an edge in the short program.

Silver: Meg Masters

Meg’s original vessel (conveniently also named Meg) burned out pretty quick, and though her second lasted longer, she still qualifies for the short program.

Bronze: Ruby 1.0

We never know Ruby’s first vessel’s name, but she isn’t around too long, anyway before Ruby picks a new, veggie vessel in Ruby 2.0.

 

Hell Endurance

Gold: John Winchester

100 years of torture. 100 years being offered the chance to get off the rack everyday, and refusing every time until his soul was freed earns John Winchester the Gold.

Silver: Sam Winchester

While his torture in the cage may have been as long and difficult as his father’s, Sam never had the option or temptation to not be tortured, which is John just beats him out for the Gold.

Bronze: Dean Winchester

Dean may be the Righteous Man, and we may know more about what happened to him in Hell than either of the other Winchester men, in the end, Dean eventually said yes and got off the rack after 30 years before being saved from Hell by the angel Castiel.

 

Death: Long Program

Gold: Mary Winchester

Yes, she’s back, but Mary managed to stay dead for over 30 years, which is quite the feat in this show.

Silver: John Winchester

John died just one time in Supernatural, but that one time stuck, and he’s been ashes now for nearly twelve years, only briefly returning as a ghost when his kids opened a hellgate. Any other times we’ve seen John, it’s been in the past, which keeps his streak still going strong.

Bronze: Bobby Singer

Bobby died from a bullet in the head in season seven, but that didn’t keep him down, as the Winchester’s surrogate father came back as a ghost, and has made an appearance in some form at least once a season after his spirit was laid to rest.

 

Death: Short Program

Gold: Dean Winchester

Dean has died more than anyone else, but his deaths never seem to stick, with his longest time being a scant three months. He also died and came back most recently, in Advanced Thanatology.

Silver: Castiel

We’re not sure how many times Cas has been killed, but we do know that Chuck has “put him back together so many times” He’s lost count. He’s also died second most recently at the end of season twelve.

Bronze: Sam Winchester

Sam has been killed a few times, but much fewer times than his brother, and he hasn’t seen the Other Side at all since season five.

Hunting: Partners

Gold: Sam and Dean Winchester

I mean, this goes without saying. Legends are told about the brothers. They are the stuff of prophecies and gospels, the things angels and monsters alike fear. They’ve been hunting together longer than any other pair that we know of, and don’t look to be quitting any time soon.

Silver: Bobby and Rufus

They may have broken up and gone their separate ways, but flashbacks and mentions from both the men has shown us that they were a capable, and effective team.

Bronze: The Hunter Husbands

Jesse and Cesar Cuevas were only in one episode, but they were a fantastic team on and off the hunt and managed to do the impossible: Retire.

Hunting: Singles

Gold: Gordon Walker

Deadly, efficient, and ruthless, Gordon didn’t need a partner and was more likely to get anyone he was working with killed than actually work with them.

Silver: John Winchester

Even when he had the sons he personally trained and raised to hunt available to help him, John Winchester preferred to work alone. He also had a talent for pissing potential partners off or getting them killed.

Bronze: Claire Novak

As much as her foster-mother, Jody, tries to partner up with her, the youngest Novak is most definitely a lone wolf, though it’s looking more and more like she will be joining a team fairly soon.

Die Hardest

Gold: Amara

Literally nothing will kill her, not even God. It’s tough to destroy Destruction herself.

Silver: Rowena

You can try to kill her, but she’ll just get better. Every time. After the world ends there will be two things left: cockroaches and Rowena.

Bronze: Billie

As a Reaper, Billie is already tough to kill, but when Cas slid that angel blade into her back, Bille didn’t just survive, she thrived as the new Death.

Die Easiest

Gold: Death

You’d think being around longer than God Himself would teach Death some self-defense, but it only took one swipe of his scythe to take down Death.

Silver: Leviathans

Sure it was tough to figure it out, but who knew Borax had so many uses?

Bronze: Demons

You need a special blade, or an angel on your side to kill them, otherwise you have to trap them and exorcise them before they swap meat suits.

Staring: Long Program

Gold: Dean and Cas

No other qualifiers. I tried to find a pair that could even come close to the staring that these two do, and I couldn’t. I checked on YouTube, and from season four to nine, they spent about 30 minutes just… looking at each other meaningfully. You could literally fill and entire episode with their gaze.