Beautiful gowns, declarations of love, bad boy British actors, Sylvia Plath, subtle shade at superheroes, friendship, laying on the floor, bitch slaps & more were featured on last week’s The Mindy Project.
If I have to go on my phone, have I failed or has theatre failed?
Jeremy takes Mindy to a play that his old friend from Uni is starring in but there’s no music for her to dance in the aisles to – like in Mamma Mia – so she spends the whole show on her phone. Given that it’s a tiny theatre and that she’s sitting IN THE FRONT ROW, Leland Breakfast sees her, grabs her phone, shames her in front of everyone and then throws her phone across the stage.
After the show, Min & Jer head backstage to shower Leland with praise but he’s kind of a dick to Jeremy and then aggressively hits on Mindy. He’s gone through the pics on her phone (gross) and put his number in it (no thank you). Mindy turns him down because she has a boyfriend (HI BEN I LOVE YOU).
Took me forever to get rid of Robert Blake, but when I did, did I ever
Jeremy is throwing a party for Leland and Mindy doesn’t get why everyone is excited to hang out with some Broadway nerd. Tamra tells her that he’s actually Dr. Universe form the Marvel movies – since that means he knows Cobie Smulders, Mindy thinks he’s cool now. she’s still not interested though because she has a boyfriend.
That seems like a strange request for a grown man from this century
Dr. Z (my new favourite doctor that isn’t Mindy) is looking for Jody because she’s the only one that actually does any work at Shulman. Colette informs her that Jody needs to sit a while and do some reckoning (WTF YO) and Morgan fills her in on the whole Jody/Mindy history. Anna one hundred percent doesn’t care so she just leaves to go do something more productive with her time.
You got a book of poems, as a present…
Mindy and Bae Ben are riding the subway together & he thinks he’s being hella sweet by giving her a book of poems, but this is Mindy, so she probably feels like she’s being punished. Min then invites him to Jeremy’s Leland Breakfast party. Bae Ben totally geeks out because he LOVES Dr. Universe; he went as him for Halloween last year and he has a Leland doll action figure.
They are adorable and perfect and seriously I love Bae Ben so much it’s like glitter is exploding inside me. Below I present a Sylvia Plath poem that was probably in the book Bae Ben gave Mindy because it’s one of my faves and it sort of applies to the situation.
Were you arguing against evolution in court again?
Later, Tamra walks into Jody’s office and sees him looking more put together than normal, he says he’s having dinner with a friend and Tamra’s so relieved that he has a hot date and won’t have to go to an Exotic Marigold Hotel to find love. He is super vague about it and runs off so Tamra, naturally, snoops in his planner which just happens to be open on his desk and sees that his dinner is with Jen Trang.
I also want to point out that the only other thing on his calendar that week is “record Elementary” and it’s underlined a bunch because clearly the show has become super important to him. I don’t know if I’m the only person to have noticed this tiny joke (probably not) but I love it so much!!
Now we’re gonna miss her festival deadlines
Morgan & Colette are recording one of her sexy ice cream dances (examples here & here & here) when Tamra comes in to share the good news of Jody dating someone age appropriate – “with a name like Jen she has to be at least 30.” Morgan & Colette recognize her as Dr. Trang WHO JUST HAPPENS TO BE MARRIED. This is on brand for sleezeball Jody and annoys Colette so much she can’t even finish her dance.
Take your blood and your urine and your adorable boyfriend stories and get your ass up out of here
It’s a brand new day at Shulman and Jeremy is trying to teach Mindy computer things when this tiny bubbly blonde walks in and says her boyfriend is Ben Miller. MINDY’S BEN! I had intense Josh PTSD and was sure they would fight but Tamra & Morgan just leap to Mindy’s defense and kick the girl out while poor Min just sits there, shellshocked.
Do I look like I want drug-resistant crabs?
Colette barges into Dr. Trang’s delivery to traumatize a baby and yell at her for going out with Jody. Jen is all lolol no ew it wasn’t a date! Apparently, Jody is uncomfortable working with Mindy after that whole rejection thing so he was interviewing to move to Jen Trang’s practice! Colette almost passes out because she didn’t know and this is the first time he’s kept a secret from her. Good thing there’s an oxygen tank nearby.
First, how dare you? Second, HOW DARE YOU?!
Elsewhere in the hospital, Mindy is hanging out in the doctors lounge when Ben walks in, asking why she hasn’t texted him back about going on a hike. She hits him with the classic Lahiri/Kapoor/Kaling double how dare you. He’s a dude so he’s confused & Mindy has to confront him about his lab tech girlfriend. He says they’re just hanging out, just like he is with Mindy, because they never talked about it and yada yada things guys say when they front like they’re nice and sweet but they know they’re wrong. Mindy un-invites him from the party and leaves like the boss ass bitch that she is! #slayqueen
Knowing Father, there are almost certainly sisters we don’t know about
Colette is confronting Jody about him secretly leaving the practice without her and Morgan is also there for some reason. Every day he has to watch Mindy butter her donut while she microwaves her bacon and he can’t take it anymore.
Fine I’ll sleep with a celebrity, jeez
Elsewhere, Mindy is on the floor of her office with sour straws again, bummed about Ben and his cheating ass nonsense. Jeremy & Tamra convince her to text Leland who responds RIGHT AWAY and asks her to be his date to the party.
Don’t nitpick, I’m in a bad place right now man
At the hospital, Ben goes to Morgan to see if Mindy is ready to forgive him yet or if he should “wear a cup.” It’s sorta cute that he knows she’d immediately try to destroy his groin but I digress. Morgan tells him that she’s with Leland now and that he lost his shot. Ben is all “technically I wasn’t cheating” and then, y’all, Morgan gets WISE!
Morgan: “once people start falling back on technicalities, THEY KNOW THEY’RE WRONG.”
Ben: “there’s a good point in there somewhere”
Morgan: *holds his hands out for a tip* *loses all wisdom he previously had*
You look like a fit Abe Lincoln
It’s the night of Jeremy’s party. Leland is telling Mindy a story about how Idina Menzel slapped him across the face for being gross when he notices that Jody & Colette aren’t paying him any attention (#actors) so he calls Jeremy over to ask why. The Kimball Kinney’s are fighting because Dr. Trang won’t hire Jody anymore and Colette feels abandoned by him. To get their attention again, & make Jody, the young lady, feel better, Leland does his own rendition of “And I Am Telling You.” Tbh this song is a hate crime because he’s singing it instead of Jennifer Hudson but we can let it slide.
Brown & Princeton are the same the way that Rob & Kim are both Kardashians
Bae Ben shows up to the party mid-song and after fanboying out for a second about Dr. Universe singing a song, waves Mindy into one of Jeremy’s rooms. In what is unusual for Mindyland, they actually talk about their feelings and insecurities. Ben confesses that he wasn’t sure she’d be serious with him but Mindy’s like I suck why would you think that. Bae Ben quickly tells her she doesn’t suck (cough unlike someone who had a list of her faults at the ready coughhhh) and that she’s glamorous & smart and he thought he wasn’t enough for her. Mindy reminds him that she’s also just a single mom trying to make it work and wearing a pull-up because she forgot to do laundry. Bae Ben comes back with “the other girl never met my daughter” which makes it seem like he really is genuinely into her and didn’t mean to cheat and he’s sorry and I just love him so much so I forgive him and this paragraph is getting too long I’m sorry, I’m done.
My alcoholism is too high functioning for anyone to intervene
Anna sees Jody trying to leave the party so she drags him into the bathroom to slap some sense into him. Literally, she slaps him across the face – another woman to whom we need to send flowers. She tells him to “stop being a vagina” and follows it up with “but don’t repeat that because female genitalia are strong, hashtag I’m with her, the female Ghostbusters are better, blablabla.” Jody is still rambling on about his sadness so she just kisses him. “You kissed someone else, NOW BE NORMAL!”
I’m making my Brexit if anyone cares to join.
Bae Ben & Mindy are still in the room when Leland walks in with the 10k he made for Broadway cares during that performance. Bae Ben tells him to gtfo because Mindy is his girlfriend now so their date is over. Leland does not take this well and wants to fight but Bae Ben isn’t going to punch Dr. Universe, so Dr. Universe punches him. Then Breakfast storms out all dramatic like, all while being rude to Jeremy and asking everyone to go with him. Mindy & Tamra stand up to him and stay with their friend Jeremy Reed and kick everyone else out.
The core gang then gathers around the piano while Jeremy plays a song and they all dance & groove. Shoutout to director David Stassen for that GORGEOUS end fade out the window, where we see everyone having a good time together and being a family. Honestly it gave me so many feels to see everyone from the ensemble, old and new, from Jeremy to Tamra to Colette & Anna, in the same scene. I don’t even know you guys, it just made me emotional. We’ve just been through so much with this show and for it to be excelling now in it’s FIFTH season, about to hit 100 episodes, I just *all the heart eyes*.
A new episode of The Mindy Project is now streaming on Hulu.
Photos courtesy of NBCU