“Trust Me”

After a critically acclaimed rookie season, I think the majority of viewers can agree “UnREAL” struggled in its vision and scope in season two. From miscasting a bland, boring and uninvolved suitor (BJ Britt as Darius Beck), to uninspired contestants, to the complete TRAIN WRECK that was the police brutality episode; “UnREAL” lost its spark and fun somewhere between season one’s finale and season two’s second episode.

The season finale entitled “Trust Me” rectified the up and down season somewhat. Not that the season could be completely salvaged, but “UnREAL” took it back to the basics: gossipy, satirical fun of showmance. One of Quinn’s quotes of the night was “I wanna see blood on the floor;” boy, oh boy, did we get that in spades.

With Quinn’s warning about Coleman ringing in her ears, Rachel tears his side project down to the studs. Footage, gone. Audio, gone. Non-disclosure agreement, implied. Turns out Coleman isn’t the pristine auteur we were made to think he was. Allegations of locals being paid on his documentary about modern-day slavery and sex trafficking dogged him to the “Everlasting” set. Rachel found out and Rachel did what any good producer would do: she worked her angles. With Coleman out of the way, the focus became getting Yael to spin the narrative in the direction Quinn and Rachel wanted for “Everlasting.” For a raging narcissist (Rachel’s words, not mine), Yael jumped on board quickly.

This is a showmance, so I guess we must discuss Darius, Chantal and Tiffany (yawn, snooze, snore). These are the most potentially unsuited couples in the history of fake showmance. When Darius is told he will need to MARRY one of the ladies, instead of just getting engaged, he visibly recoil and blanches. That was the face of a man having a full scale panic attack. As these things go, it’s all about the dollar, dollar bills y’all…and Romeo (alive, healthy and managing once more) reminds Darius more than once.

And the top two, the last women standing, Chantal and Tiffany? They are in paroxysms of delight at the idea of marrying a man after only 9 weeks. It is the best and worst bits of showmance, both real and imagined (as “Everlasting” is). As the women’s families arrive, the palpable sense of dread and anticipation picks up. The pacing and direction of “Trust Me” was very solid and cast provided the perfect looks and glances that heightened everything.

In the end, the disastrous double wedding is a…disaster. Quinn dupes Chantal and Tiffany into thinking their each marrying Darius and they have not a clue until they walk down the fancy dual aisle. It is THE moment of shock…until Ruby shows up. Jay, having seen how off the rails their production has become, gets Darius’s true love Ruby to save him. The best part: he proposes and she says no! She instead insists they “see where this goes” and they motor off together in the “Everlasting” limo.

The devastation and resignation are clear on Quinn, Chet and Rachel’s faces. In the weirdest and and least obvious plot twist ever, Jeremy brings relief to all of them. Roll prior scene: Yael and Coleman are escorted off of the set and storm off in his obnoxious sports car to “tell the true story of ‘Everlasting’.” Jeremy tells the production trio “I’d do anything for the show.” In the tv background, a news anchor tells of a grisly car accident while showing aerial footage of Coleman’s obnoxious sports car.

Jeremy! What. Did. You. Do. Sir?!

We’ll find out next summer on season three of “UnREAL.” Thanks for rolling on the #GetReal train this year!