Alright kids. We’re back. Orphan Black is BACK and golly-geeeeee I am so excited to have something to give me meaning again.
To be fair, I’m hoping this season changes course. By and far, the Castor boy subplot was my least favorite, and I felt like the military thing of last season was going to kill me.
However, we’re supposedly heading back into the Neolution direction, and I can’t imagine how, but Tatiana’s going to be cracking into some new clones. I want more Allison, I want more Rachel, and I want more Allison. Did I say Allison twice?
Okay. Under the cut is my LIVE response to Season 4, epiosde ONE. Season Premiere!
Let’s do this.
recap including Beth
alright we’re going way back
Maggie Chen mentions
oh shit the bug things I forgot about this
Sarah and her Kira are in Antarctica.
RECAP over the sheep mask from the promos is here
Sheep mask walking through the woods at night!
Spying on some people…..who are burying a body.
Alright so we’re in it
oh god they’re making out over the dead body what kind of
Sheep mask made a noise and they are looking for her oh my god
they’re EMS people btw
she left a tiny little bear sticker on the tree
now a phone is ringing.
Beth is getting a phone call, from Sheep mask!
Sheep mask???????? Knows something. Theory is she’s a clone.
Sheep mask sent some coordinates
Uh oh, beth is snorting some prescriptions
Paul is very shirtless and it’s upsetting he’s too perfect
fucking KEN DOLL SPY POS
Ok Sheep Mask is a clone I was right
Beth Childs backstory???? ALRIGHTALRIGHTALRIGHT I’M DOWN
Opening theme should just say “Tatiana Maslay” over and over lol
Alright so Beth is at the crime scene where the two EMS people were burying the body
The body is missing his cheek
and there’s lots of tattoos and the dude is wearing a white eye contact
NEOOOOLUUTIIOONN yeah yes yes alright yes
Cosmina is calling and AW talking about Allison and she’s switching schools
Wow I’ve missed these Clones golly
BETH and ART having some real talk.
OMFG FELIX IS AT THE STATION
this weird shoe-horning in other characters is like cool I guess?
when it’s relevant but how was Felix relevant
sorry I’m complaining let’s talk to bae Raj about stuff
Beth is going to borrow some surveillance stuff to spy on Paul I don’t blame ya sugar he’s a SPY you gotta SPY on SPIES
Other cops seem concerned about Beth
Okay we’re at a trailer…to visit mask clone! Who name is MK.
Either this trailer is attached to a building or this a huuuuge trailer
she’s facetiming with this new clone. MK knows about Neolution and the bugs, and says there’s a bunch of spies in Beth’s life. MK has a thick accent.
MK, or Mika, hasn’t met the other clones and doesn’t want to. Beth is the only one that knows about MK, which means when Beth died so did MK’s contact.
Olivia (Oli-vee-ay) dude with the tail is getting fitted for pants.
Beth is having a long conversation with a pregnant Neolution girl. She took the Neolution book written by Leekie who, we later find out, is the head honcho for all this clone business
so much foreshadowing??
ALLISON wants to SHOOT a gun, and is talking to Beth. She sent a package via Flower Delivery that’s so Allison.
There’s a bottle of something and a few pills
TOODLES oh god I missed you Allison
Leekie is also back. Man we’re shaking down some old people.
Leekie is at an event talking about the clone issue. And BETH just shows the fuck up
she doesn’t even know. She just wants some info and she doesn’t even KNOW he’s the head daddy! He’s in CHARGE of her life wow this is crazy this is nuts.
they’re chatting about his followers of Neolution.
Leekie says some deep shit and Beth is like ‘ok dude bye’
Oh no Beth is getting taken off the case?
A drug test too! Damn this isn’t Beth’s day.
Oh the bottle Allison gave her was clean piss alright then
Now Beth is setting up her home spy network to see what KENDOLLPAUL is up to.
Paul and Beth are having a long convo and it’s really good just ugh Tatiana is a goddess and BETH wants to fuqqqqq
Paul can’t do it and she doesn’t understand why he just won’t leave if he doesn’t love her
Now SHES POINTING A GUN AT HIS HEAD AND HE DOESN’T KNOWWWW
aiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeeee I’m screaming
Beth is visiting Art’s apartment and says hey to his daughter. She just wants to chill
Beth and Art were having an affair, right? SO maybe that’s what this is
YES I’m right they’re gonna smooch and maybe more???????
The Neolution girl is calling Beth to say she’s worried about her boyfriend who left the club with a black girl and a white guy, who MK told us earlier are the murderers.
Awwww SHOOT there’s an ambulance in this alley. Beth is hunting down the EMS murderers on her own???
Some backroom surgery is going DOWN
There’s a third guy with them and it’s another cop!!!!!!!!! FRom BETH’S UNIT OH MY GOD
JEFFERY DAHMER LOOKING DUDE
I think Beth just realized EVERYTHING is connected
they’re cutting off dudeboy’s cheek this is yuck
and there’s a LITTLE BUG OH MY GOD THE BUGS ARE BACK
Beth made a noise and is now run run running
OH GOD she shot someone
and it wasn’t the right person she shot a lady
omfg it’s all connected that’s the lady from later oh MY god
The civilian she shot
oh man it’s Maggie Chen
Now it’s showing how Art helped her cover it up
And the detective helping her is the fucking JEFFERY DAHMER NEOLUTION DUDE ok ok yeah this is fucked
Oh good we’re back to Mika. Beth is visiting her.
Now Beth is stressing because it’s too dangerous for her clone sisters
OHH we jumped to Sarah and Kira. And MK is with Art and they’re all connected.
Neolution is going after SARAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH MY GODDDDDDHHHHHHHHHH
Article Submitted by Abbi Echo