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Photo: © Channel 5. Source: Digital Spy.

Our final week of Neighbours rations was a pretty good one, although I would have been way happier to have had a full week of episodes in order to find out what happens to Elly (even if it seems pretty obvious what’s going to happen.)

For any very patient Aussies who are still bothering to read my ramblings even though we’re now comically behind, these are the episodes we got to see in the UK this week:

E8342 – Harlow and Mackenzie are badly shaken after the police raid on Mackenzie’s apartment. Harlow clashes with Paul, unaware of his involvement with Mannix. Mackenzie confides in the Rebecchis, who reassure her but phone her Aunt Trish. Aaron and David consider a fresh path after Mark suggests that they look into foster parenting.

E8343 – Aaron finds Mannix’s boxes of stolen goods at the Shed and reports the matter to Paul, whose attempts to deal with it lead to trouble for him and cause Aaron to be late for his foster care meeting with David. Roxy agrees to a date with Kyle, thinking it is just as mates. When the misunderstanding is finally cleared up, will she still be happy to be with him?

E8344 – Paul comes clean to the police about his dealings with Mannix. He escapes with an official caution, but others are not so inclined to forgive and Pierce reconsiders their business relationship. Toadie is confident about the character references he has for Elly’s defence case, but just when Elly needs the support of her friend, Chloe makes a colossal mistake.

Kyle and Roxy Still Haven’t Managed to Get Together

Kyle and Roxy are still only conducting half a conversation at any one time, so they’re both constantly on different pages about where they want to be in their relationship, or if they actually want a relationship at all. They seem like the most perfect match on the street, so I wish they’d hurry up and get together, because I’m not sure how many more episodes of Kyle looking sad and lost I can cope with.

They have another false start this week where they decide to go to dinner, only Kyle gets dressed in his Sunday best, and Roxy turns up in what I fully thought were her pyjamas until she left the house in them. He thinks it’s a date, she thinks they are going to sit in front of the TV and eat burgers. I did enjoy when she announced that she wanted to marry her burger and then referred to it as her fiancé. I have had burgers like that – in fact there is one burger in particular that still makes me go all misty-eyed when I think about it.

After a heart-to-heart, it seems that romance is back on, and Roxy is going to organise a date, so I dread to think what it’s going to be.

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Will Roxy and Kyle finally get together? Photo © Channel 5. Source: Digital Spy.

Paul is a Garbage Person

I honestly thought the only way was up for Paul after his antics in the previous week, but it seems he is absolutely not done with being an awful human just yet. He kicks off at Harlow for being involved in the police raid, despite the fact that it’s just a case of her being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Then Harlow finds out that the cause of all the drama – Mannix – is not only linked to Paul, but is committing robberies (including the one at the Kennedy house) in order to pay Paul back the money he fraudulently took from Jane.

As if that isn’t bad enough, Paul then finds out that Mannix intends to pay his debt in the form of stolen electronics, which he has shipped to Aaron’s gym. I’ll be honest, I wasn’t even sure Aaron ran the gym any more, on account of him never being there. Ironically, the one time he’s there is the exact same moment that he should be at home with David to have a meeting about becoming foster parents, and Aaron misses the whole thing while he deals with the mess Paul’s landed him in.

For once, someone on Neighbours actually does the sensible thing, and Aaron calls the police about the stolen goods, which leads to Paul throwing a gigantic tantrum where he does some pretty advanced mental gymnastics and comes to the conclusion that everyone else is to blame for all of his stupid decisions. Paul is now in the doghouse with literally everyone, and so he should be, because he is currently behaving like a moron. He even tries to make amends with Aaron and David by interfering with the foster care service even further. At that point, if I’d have been David I think I would have pushed him in the swimming pool.

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Photo: © Channel 5. Source: Digital Spy.

Pierce Makes Some Decisions

Bafflingly, billionaire Pierce decides he’s going to buy a modest house in the suburbs, rather than the insane mansion he could undoubtedly afford. The dude owns an island, and yet he’s perfectly happy living in the heart of suburbia for some reason. Not that I’m criticising suburbs, it’s just that if I was loaded the first thing I would do is buy myself a ridiculous big house.

He also decides he’s going to buy Paul’s share of the gym and go into partnership with Aaron, which I can imagine is going to go down like a cup of cold sick with Paul. I’m kind of looking forward to the two of them going toe-to-toe over this one.

There’s a Touch of Foreshadowing

Elly’s court date is looming, and everything is looking like it’s going to go to plan, so it obviously isn’t going to end well for her. We all know how soap operas work. I mean, for one thing, Toadie has said he’s confident she won’t get a custodial sentence, so if that isn’t a giant red flag to signify that something is going to go hideously wrong, I don’t know what is.

Whatever is going to go wrong for Elly has surely been put into motion by Erinsborough’s current two villains, Sam and Claudia. I don’t know what they’ve got planned, but they both seem sure that whatever they’ve done is going to land Elly in prison. They’re so evil I wouldn’t have been surprised if they’d started cackling when they were discussing it. I haven’t read any spoilers or watched ahead, but my guess is that Elly is going to go to prison, and Aaron and David will be approved as foster carers just in time to have Aster dropped in their laps. I don’t know what Claudia’s downfall is going to be, but she surely isn’t going to get away with this dastardly plan, and I’m really looking forward to her being brought down.

Next week we’re back up to five episodes, which is great news! If nothing else, having five episodes of Neighbours a week helps me keep track of what day of the week it is…