Neighbours New Year Recap

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Photo courtesy of Channel 5.

It’s been a while since I wrote about Neighbours, and there have been some pretty big events in that time. So, please indulge me while I look back over the highlights of the Christmas and New Year period on Ramsay Street.

Nanny Alice Finally Went Away

Nanny Alice got the memo that pantomime villains are only around for a short period of time over Christmas, and finally disappeared, taking her floral jumpers and headbands with her. As a final evil plan, she poisoned Sonya with pesticide and left her in a ditch, before locking Willow in the shed and doing a runner.  She also binned Sonya’s Christmas presents, which seems a bit petulant and pointless, considering she was fully expecting her to be dead. If you’re going to do that, at least take them for yourself? Although, maybe herbal tea bags and kaftans weren’t really her scene.

Jim Robinson Came Back From the Dead as a Bauble

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The ghost of Jim Robinson hopes you had a Merry Christmas PHOTO: © Channel 5

This might be my favourite TV moment of all time. When it was teased that Jim Robinson would be returning to Ramsay Street, my brain immediately sprung into action trying to figure out how they were going to write a loophole that big. Jim is dead, we all saw him get killed by that bowl of oranges, or whatever it was that happened to him. They’ve used the witness protection story line, Harold washed up in Tasmania and then came back with amnesia, and then there was the whole Dee/Fake Dee saga. So how were they going to bring Jim back? I figured it would be a Christmas Carol-style haunting of Paul, to tell him to mend his ways, and I was almost spot on. But I will have to admit, I did not see the bauble coming.

So Paul went to search for the body of Mannix, who he had previously left for dead in the bush in order to protect Leo. Making sure he had all the essential things one takes on a corpse-finding mission – phone, car keys and glass Christmas bauble – Paul set off, hanging the bauble on the rear-view mirror. This is where the ghostly apparition of his dad, Jim Robinson, who had curiously aged despite being dead, manifested itself. His message was overwhelmingly negative. He basically turned up to remind Paul how crap all his kids are and how many failed marriages he has to his name and then, having thrown that shade, promptly booked it back to the afterlife.

Honestly, forcing my family watch this on Christmas Day was my favourite thing about the whole day by far. I’m not even sorry.

Neighbours Broke The World Record For the Shortest-Lived Character in TV History

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Val Grundy – if you blinked you probably missed her PHOTO: © Channel 5

We met the extremely meta character of Val Grundy, named for one of the creators of Neighbours, Reg Grundy. She was introduced to us as the oldest resident of Ramsay Street and then promptly killed off in the space of one episode. Val turned out to be an excuse for Neighbours to use Mrs Mangel’s old living room set, which is one we haven’t seen for a while, but which is also, historically speaking, the front room of Dipi’s house. Was Val a lodger in the Sharma-Rebecchi house? Did they use the same front door?

Anyway.

Val was a hoarder, and had secreted away many discarded Ramsay Street ‘treasures’, such as Billy Kennedy’s skateboard and invitations to Paul’s many weddings. I wonder if she kept all of Mark’s engagement rings as well? All this community thieving, sorry, community spirit, led to Toadie deciding to host a Christmas concert to make everyone feel warm and fuzzy, which brings me to my next point.

Bea Won’t Stop Singing

Seriously, she won’t stop. Why won’t she stop? Can someone stop her, please? I hate people singing on Neighbours with the fiery passion of ten thousand red hot suns, so please, for the love of god, can Bea. Just. Stop. Singing.

Gary’s Further Descent Into Idiocy

Gary is a moron. He’s a grown man who still lodges with his mum, and spends his days selling crap coffee out of a shed, which is strategically placed between two bricks-and-mortar establishments that also serve coffee. He literally cannot do anything right, and I really can’t be bothered with him any more, he needs to have a word with himself.

Terese Got Shot

Terese proved herself to be the big damn hero we always knew she was, by leaping in front of Leo and taking a bullet for him, when the Renshaws finally decided to get revenge on Leo for snitching on them and upsetting the incredibly irritating Delaney. Not all heroes wear capes. Except Terese does quite often wear a cape, actually, so I’m not sure what my point is…

The Siege of Lassiter’s™

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Raymond Renshaw didn’t enjoy his latte PHOTO: © Channel 5

The siege. Not one of Erinsborough police force’s finest hours, was it? Not only did they allow a gunman to just waltz right into Harold’s while the complex was supposedly in lock down, they allowed Leo to sprint heroically through the barricades to sacrifice himself to save the others, and they left the apprehension of Ivan Renshaw down to a disgraced cop and a hotel porter. Once all that was done, they just charged in to arrest Raymond Renshaw and take all the glory. Seriously, is nobody in Erinsborough good at their job?

So that’s my very tardy festive Ramsay Street round-up. Belated Happy New Year, Neighbours!

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