Santa Clarita Diet Season 2 Episode 1 – No Family is Perfect

ITS HERE! ITS HERE! SEASON 2 IS HERE!

Obligatory spoilers alert. If you haven’t watched Season 1 yet, hit Netflix now. Just know that I am deeply ashamed of you. Otherwise, lets discuss!

As the episode opens, “Happy Together” plays and we see our beloved Hammonds essentially as we left them. Joel tucked safely away in a room at “the asylum”, Sheila going stir crazy in the basement, and Abby desperately trying to source some high quality Serbian bile. Each of them stuck in their own little torment, struggling to free themselves… either physically or metaphorically.

To the Asylum!

The song ends, and we’re left with Joel lamenting that 17 hours have passed and he needs to leave. We meet Ron, Joel’s insane temporary roommate, who also wants desperately to be on his way. After a snippy exchange in which Ron talks about his experience with the asparagus people (pronounced oz-para-gauze), Joel gets frustrated. Ron shows empathy that you just don’t expect from a man who seals his ears nightly with peanut butter because the oz-para-gauze are “just so intrusive!”

Joel gets a chance to really open up with someone who won’t judge him, for anything more than his “lazy pronunciation”, and we see how tough things have been. He’s afraid of Sheila’s decent into her zombie instincts, yet aware that he needs to get back quickly to help her. They’re interrupted by the doctor, who tells Joel he is on 72 hour hold so they can be sure he isn’t a danger to himself or others. She calls to two to group therapy session, but not without one last important question… “Will there be juice?”

On the Home Front

Back at the Hammond household, Abby is frustrated. Finding a full blooded Serbian to vomit for her is incredibly difficult, to no one’s surprise. The earliest they can get an exchange student is 6 months from now, and there haven’t been any substantial hits on the online job search board. We all know how bad people on the internet can be, and her job posting covers one of the most common offenses out there. “No dick pics please.”

Crunching noises emerge from the basement, startling the confused pair. Eric chooses to let Abby explore alone, so she descends to check on mommy dearest. Sheila makes a feeble attempt to plead for a little outside time, but Abby stands firm. Maybe Sheila’s gnawing on the support beams in the basement made her daughter second guess how behaved she could be? Abby asserts that she was left in charge, so she will handle things.

Eric excitedly informs Abby that they’ve got a hit on the job posting site, and their guy isn’t too far away. Abby heads out alone, much to Eric’s dismay, and insists that he finish the rest of the serum while she is gone. Being alone in the house with zombie Sheila does not sit too well with him, and he heads off back to the kitchen to worry while he works.

Group Therapy Time

Joel gets another chance to try and explain that he is completely fine and ready to re-enter society, which he does not succeed with at all. Ron has a deeply moving moment where he talks about his wife passing. We get to see a glimpse into the less-than comical side of his declining mental health, and I must say I was choked up a bit (So what if I cry?!). “She was here… with her beautiful smile. And then she was gone forever.”

But wait, this is a comedy! Why the sad moment?! That moment quickly passes. As Ron sips his juice box, he finds it empty. His face distorts with into a look at expresses his utter despair and disgust. “Why do they tease us with such tiny amounts of juice? Who wins this game?” Joel, still struck by how much losing his wife for a mere ten seconds hurt, hands Ron the rest of his juice box. After a brief thank you, they turn to a discussion about whether or not Ron saw any Serbian sounding names when he visited his wife in the morgue.

As the therapy session ends, Joel is approached by the doctor. Because Joel showed genuine compassion for Ron, he is no longer considered a threat to himself or others. As Joel gets ready to run out the door to find his shoelaces and hit the morgue, he’s stopped by the doctor’s obvious sadness. She expresses that the only time she gets to speak with healthy people anymore is when they’re saying goodbye. Given that he just showed signs of genuine compassion, his response of “Well… bye.” really gave me a chuckle.

Eric the Zombie-sitter

Eric, charged with keeping Sheila secure, fails miserably. She expertly convinces him to let her free, so long as she wears handcuffs. Where can they find handcuffs you, and our friend Eric, may ask? Her bedroom, bottom drawer, don’t touch anything else. We all get a glimpse into the Hammonds’ kinky sex life, and Eric is scarred by Sheila’s honesty. She gets cuffed, released, and then pops both thumbs out of their sockets to slip the cuffs. Off they go to rescue Abby! After Eric wakes back up of course.

 

What’re You Into?

Abby finds Goran, the man who answered her job posting, in an apartment building. He is… creepy. Assuming she wanted to watch, he invites her in. Abby begins to run, and Goran assures her he’ll be only a moment. Even though Goran’s horrendous flirting game is reminiscent of Warner Brother’s Pepé Le Pew mixed with George Costanza from Seinfeld, Abby heads inside to wait for his vomit.

Joel revisits the morgue from season 1, where he purchased a foot for Sheila to eat. Before he could get his newest request out, the morgue workers offers to sell him some lady parts for $500. Joel learns that most people who come searching for parts are men into much freakier things than handcuffs. He is ushered in so his new pal can try to locate the gallbladder of a Serbian.

Goran emerges from a side room carrying a small container of bile, and some extra in a cup. Abby pays cash, and attempts to rush away. Goran, turning the creepy dial up to 11, decides to try and invite her to stay for some Chocolat or maybe something salty. ::Shudders:: Pepper spray in hand, Abby assures him she is leaving.

Home Sweet Ho…oh My Word!

Abby walks in, triumphantly holding the bile, to an empty home. Turn around, and Goran is there bringing stalker to new heights. Bad move buddy. Sheila comes home, in the nick of time, and gets to relieve some stress. Sheila pounces. Goran goes down. Goran goes all over the kitchen… well his blood does anyway.

Joel arrives home, bag of bile in hand, to reunite his family. What he finds is a red spin-art version of what was his kitchen. Sheila and Abby rush in, cleaning supplies in hand, and the explanations start. Abby says not to worry! She’s got everything under control. Joel’s not convinced.

Eric brings in the good news that the serum has worked, and Sheila wont be getting any worse! Besides being a tad perturbed that he spent $300 on bile since “no one called”, Joel is more than a bit worried that Sheila has already gone too far. While the tension in the air hangs thick, the neighbors Rick and Alondra ring the doorbell. While they are concerned for the Hammonds, Joel successfully sends them on their way without them seeing the bloody mess his kitchen has become.

Gotta Restock and Regroup

Hoping the Hammonds would disagree, Eric exclaims that this is all his fault for letting Sheila out. They don’t, and he heads out to get more cleaning supplies while they discuss Sheila staying in the basement until things are “figured out”. At the store, everyone’s favorite emotionless staff member, Ramona, is there to help Eric with more than just selecting the right cleaning products. After a sincere, though emotionally deadpan, series of helpful words of wisdom, Eric and Ramona seem to have formed a bond. She points out the best cleaning supply for blood, since Eric is sporting some on his shoe, and he hurries back.

Joel and Abby mop blood off of the ceiling and discuss Sheila’s current state. Even though things look grim, Joel still finds that silver lining. Ron’s story of his wife obviously struck a chord with Joel, and he isn’t going to lose Sheila again. The doorbell rings, and it is revealed that Sheila ordered some takeout for the family.  Joel and Abby head off to eat dinner and finish cleaning, happy that Sheila thought of them, but not before a quick bit of dark humor.

Night Time Wrap Ups

Joel and Sheila attempt a quick conversation about how things are going. While Sheila dives into the schedule she is planning regarding their real estate and Abby’s dress shopping trip. Sensing that Joel is uncomfortable, she reassures him that they can make the best of her basement living quarters. After discussing paint, carpeting, and even a longer chain, Sheila asks Joel not to give up on her. Joel replies a simple, “Never”, as “My Life” starts to underscore.

After a short set of clips showing how sad Joel and Sheila are apart, Joel returns to the basement. They agree that living apart is not the right plan, they never want to lose each other again, and that they should keep the chains for “sex stuff”. The passionate kissing begins, until they’re interrupted by Abby coming downstairs too. They all end up in bed together, happy family, as the music begins to fade. Episode over!

Or Is It?

Eric sits playing games late in the evening. His phone rings, and our friendly cashier Ramona is on the other line. She got his number from his rewards account, that’s not creepy at all… They share some awkward flirting, and discuss each others’ relationship status. Ramona reveals she just broke up with her boyfriend, and that is was quite messy. She opens her fridge to get some finger food, and we find actual fingers among other bloody body parts. Looks like Sheila isn’t the only zombie in town! Ramona and Eric hit it off, and she propositions him to hang out sometime.

Come Back Next Week!

That concludes our little post-episode run down. Feel free to comment below about your favorite parts of season two’s first episode! ::Cough:: RON ::Cough:: We got to see some fun character development, a brutal murder, and the beginnings of a love triangle! With action like this so early on, we’re bound to see some intense things play out this season. See you next week for our run down of episode two!