Jane The Virgin is back, and so are my anxiety ridden telenovela style dreams.

Finally, after months of waiting and waiting, we pick back up where we left off last May. Jane comes out of her hotel room to find Michael shot, bleeding, and lying on the floor. He gets to the hospital while he’s still breathing, so there’s a chance he’ll make it! …damnit. I’m totally kidding. Sort of. I like Michael, I really do. Especially after all of the adorable flashbacks we saw throughout the episode (more on that later), but I still prefer Rafael. Sorry, not sorry. And if Michael makes it, that really seems like the chances of Jane rekindling the flame with Rafael are a big fat zero.

Moving on, Jane waits in the hospital with her family, while Rafael and Anezka (who’s still pretending to be Petra) are questioned back at the Marbella. Luckily (?), they were having sex at the time of the shooting, so they’re ruled out as suspects. But the police still need help going through the tapes to find anything suspicious; the problem is Anezka can’t stick around because she has to give Petra and injection every 12 hours to keep her paralyzed. Anezka is no where near as smooth as Petra, and she starts to make the cops a little nervous…

Back at the hospital, Michael’s mother arrives and starts acting like a bitch to Jane right away. She makes it into a sort of competition, like ‘oh I’m his mother, I’m hurting a lot more, and I’m taking control of this situation’. This pisses off Xiomara but Jane’s determined to keep her cool. There’s a lot else going on for them to worry about.

While they wait in the hospital, we get to see flashbacks of Jane and Michael’s past, and how their relationship got started. It turns out, Jane and Michael have been in a love triangle before! When Jane and Michael first met and kissed on her 21st birthday, Jane had already been crushing hard on a guy named Sam, who finally asked her out the day after her birthday. She didn’t really know Michael that well, so she kind of pushed him to the sideline to date Sam, but Michael didn’t want to give up without a fight. He made her soup, he pulled her over, and he called her a jackass. How romantic! (It makes more sense if you’ve seen it), and in the end, Michael won her over. And the audience was reminded of how much we want Michael to live. Flash forward to present day, where Michael needs a surgery that could kill him, but if they don’t try it, he’ll most likely end up paralyzed. Michael’s mom doesn’t want the surgery, but Jane does. “Michael’s a fighter”, she says, and finally, after talking to her husband, Mama Cordero agrees.


Jane goes in to talk to Michael before his surgery and tells him he better make it so they can grow old together and then I got dust or a stick in my eyes or something that made them water uncontrollably.

Back to Anezka, she makes it to the hospital finally, with a police escort, to visit her dear sweet sister. She has literally no time to give Petra this injection. The narrator then mentions that Petra and Michael’s lives are linked (does this mean forever or just this day??). If Petra wakes up, Michael dies (and vice versa), and all of our hearts were pounding because of course we want Petra to wake up, but of course we also (sort of) want Michael to wake up too! Anezka sneaks the injection just in time. Petra falls further into her vegetative state, and Michael wakes up.

In minor plot land, Xiomara tells Rogelio that she’s pregnant with Esteban’s baby, but she’s not going to keep it, and Rogelio supports her decision.

So all is right in JTV Land. Of course, Rose is still on the loose and Petra is still comatose, but at least Michael is alive…right?