GIF Source: Agents of Shield // ABC

Oh, joy, an episode all about Lincoln.

know, I wanted that to be sarcastic. But it actually is an episode
about Lincoln, and it actually is a joy. It provides some much-needed
character development to our favorite Australian-but-not-Australian
series regular.

The A.T.C.U. are looking for
Lincoln, who they know is an Inhuman. The one lie that Lincoln still
buys from his cult-like Afterlife days is that government agencies that
are looking for you are evil and want to hurt you. Granted, HYDRA has
literally killed him before, but I say these trust issues are rooted
deeper than that. Unwilling to turn himself in, an episode-long
superpowered manhunt ensues.

Good old Sparkplug
has broody Angel thing going on, and hoo boy, is tortured scowly
Lincoln a welcome change from drink-the-Koolaid Lincoln.

Simmons is still back (yay) and re-integrating well…ish. She has
severe PTSD and too many people or noises tends to overwhelm her, and
Liz’ acting makes me sad enough to completely forget her worrisome
murderous streak last season. She can’t even stay too long in her own
lab, much to Fitz’ distress.

Side-note, Fitz
is a hero. Total boyfriend material, ladies and gentlemen. I hope he
finds himself near Mjölnir because he proves himself worthy every damn
week. He and Bobbi chat about Simmons rehab and acknowledge their own
journeys haven’t exactly been overnight either.

wherever-they-are USA, Hunter and May are still tracking down Ward.
Interesting team-ups this season with Daisy and Mack/Hunter and May.
Never would have seen those coming. In a very drunken and very British
conversation with Hunter’s old pal Spud, they find out that in order to
prove yourself worthy to Nü-HYDRA, you have to fight your way in, in a
basement shirtless, in an anything goes brawl. (Just remember the rules
and don’t talk about it.)

Wow, if WARDRA wasn’t basically Project Mayhem already. His name is Sunil Bakshi! His name is Sunil Bakshi!

and the Secret Warriors efforts at getting through to Lincoln are less
than successful, as he is being tracked, on the move and generally
uncooperative. Rosalind decides to play her trump card and suddenly
Lincoln’s face is all over WHiH News. So much for that normal life,

In a nice bit of subtle character
development, Lincoln is picked up by an old friend and apparent A.A.
sponsor, John (AKA that guy from LOST). Aside from making sure Lincoln
hasn’t been drinking, he doesn’t ask any questions. He’s just there to

Coulson, getting sick of this game,
decides to meet with Rosalind one-on-one to chat (and definitely not
just because they clearly are romantically interested in one another).

John is being Mr. Helpful and Mr. Trusting. He’s even willing to give
Lincoln a place to stay and sell him his car. That is, until he turns on
the news of the alien threat. He threatens Lincoln with a baseball bat,
things get heated, and Lincoln accidentally kills the guy from Lost.
Again! That’s seriously pretty dark, though. He agrees to meet with

Anti-Coulson and Coulson meet up at the
beach (aww, she has an Anti-Lola!) and they discuss strategies –
basically, that A.T.C.U. has none. She reveals her trump card deux – she
has photos of Daisy and is willing to televise them. Coulson offers her
something better. The whole scene is rife with romantic tension.

of romantic, Fitz rented a restaurant out for Jemma. I mean, CLEARED IT
OUT because other people are too overwhelming for her. Oh my God. Oh MY
GOD. It’s revealed that he kept the reservation for over six months,
ever since Simmons went missing.

The Fitzsimmons date that fans have been waiting for for years goes off without a hitch. Beautiful, classy and romantic.

Pssh. Yeah, right. Whedons.

observing the menu, the waiter starts pouring the wine, and Simmons
starts having a panic attack. She starts crying and Fitz holds her. It’s
a short, beautifully acted scene and painfully, painfully real.

meets up with the mortified Lincoln, who is still upset about the fact
that he accidentally murdered his only friend for some reason. She
convinces him he is not a monster, and despite lack of chemistry, they

Dammit, now we need a ship name. Dincoln? Laisy? Thunder and Lightning? Aftershocks? Shake n’ Bake?

They are going to take him in when, woops, change of plans. They are turning him over to the A.T.C.U., Coulson’s orders.


escapes, and Rosalind orders they hold Daisy. Coulson, universally
known for acting intelligently and rationally when Daisy is involved,
decides to essentially turn himself in to A.T.C.U. He is sick of
fighting people over who gets to fight the bad guys, which makes sense, I
suppose. A dangerous alliance indeed.

Back in
the fight club, Hunter is gearing to fight his opponent – his good old
chum who apparently never really liked Hunter in the first place. Et tu,
Spud? Have we not had enough betrayal? We get some bloody knuckle
action in the arena, while May kicks the ass out of some douchebags who
more than insist on buying her a drink. Hunter eventually pulls out some
brass knuckles and with a few good hits, stops Spud from breathing.

Betrayal and friend-killing. A good theme for an episode.

very, very bloodied Hunter is tossed in front of Kebo (who spent a
whole couple seconds on screen without getting knocked out). He’s in.
the post-credits stinger, Simmons curiously informs Bobbi that she
needs to go back to the planet. She doesn’t sound hysterical or
delusional – she sounds like a woman on a mission.

I give this episode a 7 out of 10. While the Lincoln character
development helped, his main plot was shadowed by those much more
interesting side affairs. If anyone isn’t rooting for Fitz and Simmons
at this point, they can leave. And hey, at least they weren’t betrayed!

I have no theories or ideas until the next episode. See you then and Excelsior!