South Park S28 Ep 5 Review
It’s been a crazy year for South Park, but what better way to end it than returning to its Christmas roots? And for the second time in the show’s long and colorful history, we’ve got a Christmas episode revolving around Stan getting involved in the delivery of the Antichrist. Whereas that was just an insanely good story Cartman made up for a Christmas assignment, though, this one’s real. Stan, Jesus, the President and VP, Satan, and even Towelie all converge on the town for what they think is the birth of the Antichrist. Instead, Matt and Trey decided to end things on what they thought was the funniest way possible: with a cop out. Or rather, a “c*ap out.”
The President’s Number is Up!
Satan is just days away from giving birth to the Antichrist, an event that several characters refer to as a “c*ap out.” The President and VP are now so desperate to stop this that they decide to just head to South Park themselves to get Peter Thiel (and Hegseth.) They dress up as a Salvation Army Santa and an elf, and are just trying to get them out of prison in the most cartoonish way possible. Unfortunately for them, the jig is up, because Satan now knows everything!
I have to admit, after Randy idiotically gave Towelie as a gift to the President, I thought he would be stuck as his…rag for the foreseeable future. However, I think having Satan rescue him and, in return, Towelie tells him everything was clever. He knew everything that was going on, and after what he went through, you can’t blame him for ratting on the President. So Satan heads to South Park to ensure the President can’t weasel his way out of consequences again. But then Jesus in his alt-right Christian phase shows up, and things get even crazier as Satan goes into labor. The c*ap-out has begun.
That’s not the craziest part, though. The craziest part is that Stan Marsh is caught in the middle of all this with the last characters I thought we would see!
Let the C*ap Out Begin!
Stan has officially hit rock bottom this season. He finally escaped Tegridy Farms, only to find himself living in his grandpa’s retirement home and miserable about it. He’s desperate for a Christmas miracle, but he’s beyond disappointed when Jesus responds with apathy. So, he decides to look to someone else to help him.
I have to admit, given the name of the episode, I thought that the show was teeing us up for the return of Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo. Instead, Stan gets stuck with the Woodland Critters. AKA the psychotic, Satan-worshipping maniacs from Cartman’s Christmas story years ago. The show doesn’t even bother to explain how they exist outside of Imaginationland. It just hand-waves it as c*ap-outs, not making sense! The next we know, Satan’s about to deliver his butt-baby, Stand, Towelie and the Critters are guarding him, and they’re facing down the President and his flunkies in what looks to be this epic showdown!
But this is where the show ultimately decides to come up with a cop-out. Or, as the episode title suggests, a c*ap-out.
C*ap Out Cancelled
I have mixed feelings about this out that the show pulled. On the one hand, I feel like it invalidates all the tension that has been built up on the show this year and makes me feel like we wasted our time. Not to mention how this does feel like Matt and Trey had no idea how to wrap everything up. On the other hand, though, I feel like they had no choice, since it could limit potential storlines down the road and they have to keep the show a little grounded in current events. That, and I think the fate of the unborn Antichrist is a darkly hilarious dig at the President’s late associate.
Ultimately, though, it’s for the best.
As Good an Ending as We’ll Get
So, the President and VP manage to get off scott-free and waste no time celebrating not learning their lesson. However, this experience gives Satan the push he needs to finally leave the President. He was only sticking around for the baby’s sake, after all. Odds are, we can expect the President and VP to continue their antics next year, albeit in a reduced capacity. The joke was funny at first, but using it too often ruins it.
In other, more positive news, Jesus snaps out his alt-right phase when Stan calls him out for losing faith in his own teachings. It’s enough for him to finally break out of the President’s control, lawsuit be darned. And, as recompense for not being there before, Jesus gives Stan the Christmas miracle he wanted.
I was on the official South Park discord server while watching this, and everyone lit up when they saw Stan got his old house back. After spending years of misery at Tegridy Farms, Stan finally, finally has his home back. And while Mr. Mackey doesn’t have his job back, I’m willing to say that order has been restored to South Park. At least for the Boys.
What a year it has been for South Park. Lot’s of ups, downs, and crazy events. But despite it all, it managed to end the year on a happy note. Well, happy as South Park can get. What a good c*ap-out this was.
Happy holidays, everyone!
