It was always going to be hard to follow last week’s drama but things rattled along quite pleasingly this week, with plenty more for us to talk about, not least the revelation that Paul’s middle name is Stewart, which I don’t think I knew before.
Hostage Drama
Eden is recovering from some pretty gnarly injuries, but he still manages to escape from under police guard at the hospital and get to Ramsay Street without anyone noticing him. He bursts into the Kennedys’ house, armed with a scalpel, and takes Melanie hostage. As dramatic as these scenes were, I can’t help thinking that Melanie could probably have overpowered a sickly man with a tiny scalpel if she’d have tried a bit harder. Also Eden is a big dummy for not trading the scalpel in for something more menacing once he was in the house. Surely the Kennedys have a big carving knife or something that looked a bit more frightening.
The neighbours all gather in the street behind the police tape to watch the drama. Toadie is upset that nothing is being done to rescue Melanie and Aaron wants to pummel Eden into the centre of the earth, but Andrew tells them to pipe down. At this point, Toadie tells Andrew that they’re just going to go quietly home, and Andrew believes him. Honestly, Andrew, are you serious? I suspect that Andrew would wholeheartedly fall for the “I’ve got your nose” trick that you do with little kids.
Inside the house, Mel gets the bright idea to try to drug Eden, but she executes it in such a clumsy manner that he realises straight away what she’s doing. Seriously, that water looked almost as white as milk once she’d emptied the tablets into it, what she needed was some lemon barley cordial – he would never have noticed then.
Round at Toadie and Terese’s, Toadie and Aaron are going through the kitchen cupboards to find things they could use to take Eden out while Terese yells at them to stop being so ridiculous. Toad ignores her and plops himself through the Kennedys’ window with a can of what I think is oven cleaner, which he sprays into Eden’s face, allowing the police to come inside and grab him.
I don’t suppose I should get my hopes up about anyone learning a lesson from this hostage situation and starting to lock their doors on a regular basis, should I?
Melanie is OK but obviously shaken, but even so, Karl and Holly just leave her at home on her own while they both sod off to work. I know she told them to go, but come on guys. She was just held hostage, although I suppose that happens often enough in Erinsborough for it to be no big deal. When Toadie comes round to check on her later he ends up staying the night to keep her company. They start reminiscing, and Toadie gets a distinct vibe from Melanie, which he shuts down straight away.
Toadie is Being a Bit of an Idiot
Staying with Toadie for a bit, he expects Terese to be absolutely cool with him spending the night with his ex-wife, but when she puts her hand on Paul’s to comfort him, Toadie gets all bent out of shape. There was obviously nothing in the gesture apart from empathy, and if there had been, I doubt she’d have done it right in front of Toadie.
Toadie seemingly can’t see past the end of his own nose at the moment, because he gives Terese a big lecture about it being OK to comfort Paul, but that she needs to come back to her proper family. I beg your pardon, Toadfish. Not only was David Terese’s stepson for quite a considerable amount of time, but she knows what it’s like to lose a child, so there’s no wonder that she wants to try to console Paul. She’s also not the person staying out all night to keep their ex company. Do better, Toad.
Haz is Also Being a Bit of an Idiot
It will come as no surprise to anyone that Haz is still being a bit of a moron, because it seems to come so naturally to him, but he’s being really weird – absolutely tying himself in knots in order to not trigger Mackenzie’s memories of Hendrix. Grief is a strange and mysterious thing which affects people in lots of different ways, and it’s not really surprising that David’s death has brought up a few issues for Mackenzie, it’s quite common for something like that to throw you back into the grieving process.
Having dealt with some pretty heavy grief myself, I’m also aware that it can turn other people into weirdos who don’t know what to do or say when you’re around. I’m not going to pretend to know how every person who has experienced loss would want people to act around them, but whatever the heck it is that Haz is doing is not what anyone wants.
He’s so scared of upsetting Mackenzie that he swipes her breakfast out from under her nose in case she gets triggered by a hash brown, and he insists they change the plans that Mackenzie is perfectly happy with, in case it reminds her of Hendrix. Stop being weird, Haz. Just try to be a bit more normal, please, you’re wearing me out.
Chelsea and Paul are Welcome to Each Other
Where do I even start with these two? First of all, we get a black and white flashback that confirms what we all probably suspected – it was Paul who told Eden where to find Krista and the others. So whose fault is it that David is dead? It’s Paul’s fault, and I love that for him. He managed to get his son killed just because he was so intent on getting one over on Krista because he wanted to be Billy Big Balls at work.
Whether it’s because he’s trying to convince himself that Krista is to blame, or if he’s just trying to deflect the blame on to her to prevent anyone looking in his direction, Paul decides to start trying to turn everyone else against her. He starts with some low-hanging fruit by persuading Aaron that Krista is the reason David is dead. Aaron is a simple creature, and it takes all of about thirty seconds to convince him, and the upshot is that Krista is banned from David’s funeral.
Whatever Paul thinks of Krista, David liked her, so she should absolutely come to his funeral, because David’s funeral is not all about you, Paul. UGH.
Paul is being such an absolute hosepipe that I’m actually finding it difficult to feel sorry for him over the way that Chelsea is preying on him, but it still remains that her behaviour is utterly disgusting. She is taking advantage of someone who just lost their son, to try to insert herself into their life and make herself indispensable, all so that she can profit from it financially at some point. When it’s pointed out to her that Paul doesn’t have as much money as he did before his divorce from Terese, Chelsea breaks into Toadie’s office to get her hands on their divorce paperwork. She’s so vile.
Remy can see exactly what Chelsea is doing, and I’m 100% with Remy on this one. Chelsea is revolting and she needs to be popped into a leaky boat and pushed out into the sea.
