How are we all doing after that week? This is by far the biggest week we’ve had since the return of Neighbours, so there’s a lot for us to unpack, although David’s suitcase can probably wait for now.
What? Too soon?
Chelsea Continues to be Awful
I still hate Chelsea, and it appears to be catching because Cara’s had enough of her too. Chelsea is still strutting around like she’s some sort of girl boss, but Wendy gets in her face about the fact that she hasn’t paid Sadie for her work at the pop-up. Wendy is so mad that she even wants Andrew to put his police Bat Belt on to go and intimidate her.
Obviously, the reason she hasn’t given Sadie any money is because she hasn’t got it, so she borrows money from Cara to pay her and then talks about it in front of Remy. Remy is put out that Cara is hiding things from her again and understandably overreacts a little bit. The way Chelsea speaks to Remy and Cara after this is absolutely horrendous. She just gets worse and worse.
She accuses them of settling with each other when it’s clear that they’re very happy together, and she’s flat-out rude to Remy. Cara finally sees what a horrible dusty husk of toxicity Chelsea is and asks her to leave. Chelsea automatically assumes that this is Remi’s idea and patronisingly tries to manipulate Cara into going back on her decision. Cara stands firm, so Chelsea flounces off to the hotel, although quite how she’s going to pay for it is anyone’s guess. I suppose she’s hoping that if she gets Paul into bed, he’ll comp the room for her, so she immediately kicks up a fuss and demands to see the manager, then promptly gets him into the sack. Fair play to her for attempting to rinse Paul, I guess, but I still think she’s absolute garbage.
Santo Takes a Punt
Melanie has been going around telling everyone that she and Santo are on like Donkey Kong, but it’s a blatant lie. Terese happens to witness a date between Santos and Vera Punt, and so naturally comes to the conclusion that Santo is cheating on her. I laughed quite a lot at this pairing because was there really no other incidental character that Santo could have gone on a date with apart from Vera Punt, the woman whose only purpose in life is to be the punchline to any slapstick setup at the Lassiters complex?
Presumably, Vera covering herself in Wendy’s perfume works a treat with Santo because he seems very taken with her. The perfume thing is such weird behaviour. If I smelled a nice perfume on someone, I would definitely not assume they had it on their person, and absolutely would never ask if I could douse myself with it. Vera is profoundly weird. What an icon.
Terese tells Toadie that Melanie is being two-timed, and it brings out Toadie’s protective side, so when he sees Santo talking Melanie through a box of fruit as if she’d never seen any before, he comes over and comes close to decking him. Melanie has to come clean, and the whole situation leaves Terese feeling even more insecure about Melanie’s proximity than she did before.
Spy Kids
Paul is desperate for gossip on what Krista and Leo are up to, so he offers to pay for Sadie’s clown make-up course if she’ll spy on Leo. Sadie is reluctant to do it, but honestly, it’s the easiest payday that anyone has had in the history of capitalism. First, she spies on Leo and Krista while Paul is literally in the same room and could just listen in himself, then she goes down to the bar and does some more spying, choosing to stay undercover by holding Leo’s own child in front of her face. I’m not sure Sadie is cut out for spying if I’m perfectly honest. Perhaps she should try to make a career out of glueing gems to her eyelids after all.
The Airbnb is Next Level
I want to know what sort of money everyone in the weekend away gang is earning because that Airbnb they’ve hired is absolutely next level. OK, Krista is from a rich family, but I doubt she’d be the one footing the bill for everyone. Leo owns a vineyard, so I’m sure he’s making good money, but David is a sobriety coach with a total of one (1) client, Aaron is a bartender, and Nicolette is purely decorative. How are they affording this actual mansion? I’m looking at treating myself to a solo birthday Airbnb getaway, and I’m literally looking at shepherd’s huts because they’re pretty much all I can afford.
Anyway, weirdly, four of the five of them decide to immediately head outside for a walk, which is bizarre behaviour when you’ve just got to your holiday accommodation. Everyone knows that you have to spend several hours looking inside every single cupboard, bouncing on all the beds, sighing smugly, and saying, “This is better than being at work” every time you sit down.
While out for a walk, Leo and Krista finally manage to ditch Aaron and David so they can go and lie really uncomfortably on some wet-looking grass, and then suddenly Eden appears out of nowhere. He somehow knows Krista is pregnant and admits to spiking Krista’s drink before squaring up to Leo. I sense Paul might be involved in Eden’s return, but it’s just a hunch.
Meanwhile, Nicolette is wandering around the house and comes face to face with Veronica. I’m now starting to realise how they might have got a cheap deal when they rented this house because in exchange for a discount, the company must have advertised the address to any and all of their potential stalkers. There’s simply no other explanation for how two separate, unconnected nutters managed to gatecrash this holiday at precisely the same time.
The Veronica situation comes to an anticlimax, so I’m not going to waste any more of our time on that one. Honestly, what was the point of all that?
Back to the outdoor psychopath situation, Aaron and David hear the scuffle between Leo and Eden and come running to help. David sees Eden pushing Leo towards the edge of a cliff and selflessly cannonballs himself at Eden, taking both of them over the edge.
Boo Hoo
David and Eden go plummeting over the cliff, and when Aaron and Leo make their way to the bottom, they find David and Eden both injured. David insists that Eden is rescued first because he wants to atone for letting Gareth die last time they had a disastrous trip to the countryside.
Leo and Aaron take Eden up to the top, where Krista drives him to hospital. By the time Leo and Aaron get back to David, it’s too late. A heartbroken Aaron and a devastated Leo bring David back home, where David’s family gathers at the hospital to say their goodbyes. It’s only later that Aaron discovers a voice note on David’s phone, revealing that he knew he was about to die and saying all the things he wanted to say to Aaron and his family.
First of all, I need to say that everyone’s acting in this episode was absolutely top-notch. From Aaron’s empty thousand-yard stare to Paul breaking down to Karl welling up at the hospital, everyone was on top form. But, and this might be a controversial opinion, I’m really angry with David. (And yes, I’m aware he is a fictional character, but I’m still annoyed, so hear me out!)
I understand that his motivation was to make up for not treating Gareth and allowing him to die, but where does the grief and devastation this has caused for his family fit into that atonement? By allowing Eden to be treated first when he knew he was so gravely injured, the best-case scenario was that Eden lived and David died. The worst-case scenario was that they both ended up dead, as there was no guarantee that Eden was going to survive his injuries either.
All David has achieved by getting help for Eden first is to save the life of a no-good, manipulative abuser while plunging his family into an absolute horror show of grief. Aaron has lost his “boo”, Leo has lost his twin, Isla is a parent down, Paul has lost a son – and for what? To save the life of a criminal who has hurt people before and probably will again. I don’t understand what he thought it would achieve, and it’s utterly infuriating. Am I alone in this? Is anyone else livid with him?!
My anger aside, it was a cracking week on Neighbours, and I can’t wait to see what happens next.
