© Channel 5

Neighbours has been pretty entertaining this week, and I am putting it down to the fact that it’s because there was a dramatic reduction in the amount of Melanie, which I am fully in favour of. Sadly, we appear to have replaced one annoying blonde with another one in the form of Amy, but at least she’s irritating in a slightly more entertaining way than Melanie is. Here are a few of my other thoughts on this week’s Neighbours, in no particular order.

Pierce’s Puzzling Priorities

Pierce turns up out of the blue, and while Hendrix is initially not very keen on the idea, he agrees to spend some time with him after pep talks from Karl and Mackenzie – after all, it means a lot to him that his dad wants to mend their relationship enough to travel all the way from another state to spend time with him. Pierce cocks everything up almost immediately though, by telling Paul that he’s actually in the area to offload the vineyard where he and Chloe got married, even going as far as to say that the vineyard is the last thing that ties him to Erinsborough. He says this while his son is standing behind him, and Hendrix is unsurprisingly unimpressed. Pierce has got some work to do to get back into Hendrix’s good books.

One of the most enjoyable things about Pierce’s return is the way that Paul repeatedly tries to get one over on him, only to have Pierce shoot him down every time. My favourite was the one where Paul was drinking from a tiny espresso cup, because it’s quite hard to look authoritative while you’re doing that at the best of times, let alone when someone is zinging you with pithy comebacks.

Getting back to Pierce’s skills as a dad, he really is one of the worst parents ever to grace the hallowed ground of Ramsay Street, and that’s saying something because there have been some real shockers. Despite making a real mess of things with Hendrix, rather than healing the rift with his son being the priority, Pierce makes it his mission to stir up trouble between Chloe and Nicolette instead. Surely your child should take precedence over messing with your ex-wife’s love life, but apparently not. Pierce immediately makes Chloe go all gooey while they reminisce about the wedding, invites her to come and “say goodbye” to the vineyard before he sells it (because who wouldn’t want to revisit the site of their failed marriage with their ex? What a tip-top day out!), and then sows seeds of doubt in Chloe’s mind about how quickly she rushed into her relationship with Nicolette. Seriously, Pierce, you and Chloe are not together anymore, you just need to let it go.

Seriously though, what is that blouse? Photo: © Channel 5. Source: Digital Spy

Chloe Has Her Doubts

After Pierce’s meddling, Chloe begins to have doubts about the way she embarked on her relationship with Nicolette. They got together right after her mum died, and while the wounds were still healing from Pierce’s affair and the subsequent break-up of their marriage. Personally, I think that the thing Chloe should be having doubts about is the quite frankly baffling blouse she is wearing. The pink poufy-shouldered monstrosity with wrinkly sleeves is something that should have been firmly left in the 1980s, along with Pierce’s parenting style and his attitude towards bisexuality.

Yashvi and Ned Split

In a move that surprised absolutely nobody apart from Ned and Yashvi, they finally decide to call time on their relationship, which has been on a life support machine for quite some time. They initially try to rekindle it by deciding to move in together, but after Yashvi finds the sketch of Sheila that Ned drew she has second thoughts, and the two of them end up calling the entire thing off. They’ve been flagging for so long, it was only a matter of time before it all fizzled out. It would be nice to see Yashvi being fun and single for a while because she’s turned into the dull cop character and I’d like her to rediscover some of her oomph.

Ned and Yashvi decide to stop flogging a dead horse. Photo: © Channel 5. Source: Digital Spy

Roxy vs. Amy

The tension between Roxy and Amy reaches a new level after a couple of incidents at the Flamingo Bar. First, the stage for the workout competition collapses, causing Levi to get a touch squashed under the weights he’s lifting. Amy immediately tries to blame Roxy for the incident, since she’s the one who was in charge of putting up the stage, but Terese points out to Amy that, as the manager, she should be supervising everything and that she can’t keep trying to pass the buck. Amy employs Ned as a barman, and he gives Pierce and Terese a demonstration of how to make a cocktail and proceeds to pour approximately 4 litres of whatever alcohol it is into the glass without using a measure. Terese is furious and rips Amy a new one for allowing the bar staff to free pour and flout the licensing rules. Amy then blasts Roxy for not training Ned properly (surely overseeing training is also something the manager should be doing?), then moans to Toadie about how she can’t fire Roxy because she’s Terese’s niece. Toadie points out that she absolutely can fire her if she has a good reason and so, conveniently, the next day there’s money missing from the till which Amy immediately blames on Roxy. I’ll admit that Roxy is a bit of a loose cannon, but so is Amy. The difference is that Roxy is the fun barmaid while Amy is the manager – it’s like hiring a clown to run a circus instead of a ringmaster. Roxy has been doing her best to rub Amy up the wrong way, but Amy should be professional enough to actually manage her employees, rather than just flounce around telling everyone what a good manager she is.

A Floral Fatality

After last week’s hilarity with Clive being an awful house guest, tragedy strikes as his beloved plant dies. He jumps to the conclusion we all would have jumped to, and blames Nicolette straight away, only for Jane to later confess that it was her who killed the plant. Having previously thought living with Clive was delightful, even Jane had got a bit sick of him and wanted him to go home. Who knew Jane could be capable of planticide? I can’t wait to find out what other dark and dastardly deeds she might commit, she’s a dark horse, that one…