Neighbours was a bit of a mixed bag last week, with lots of little storylines, but lacking in any really big plots. My round-up is going to follow suit, so here are a few thoughts on last week’s episodes.

Terese in Rare Display of Patience

For someone who usually doesn’t tolerate even the slightest whiff of nonsense, Terese is displaying a quite astounding level of patience with Roxy and her ridiculous antics. If anyone tore one of my dresses and then covered it in tomato sauce during a food fight, I would go absolutely ballistic, and if the dress in question was a wedding dress I think I would be able to launch myself into the stratosphere powered only by my rage. But Terese sort of just shrugged and said she’d get it repaired. I need to know what relaxation techniques she’s using at the moment, because I would love to be that laid back.

A Whiff of Vance

I thought we’d got rid of the big ridiculous manchild and his leather waistcoat, but there was a distinct whiff of Vance last week, as one of his minions came to Roxy and Leo’s rubbish bar to scam Leo out of all of his money. I don’t even like Vance being mentioned by name, because it makes me think he might come back, which I don’t want because I find him so incredibly tedious.

Pregnant Woman is Pregnant

Elly is back again and now her entire personality has been taken over by the fact that she’s pregnant. I know being pregnant is a big deal, but all she does is rub her belly and talk about nappies and constipation. I think I preferred her when she was a disaster tornado, tearing through Erinsborough leaving a swathe of terrible decisions in her wake.

neighbours elly chloe

Photo: © Channel 5. Source: Digital Spy

Amy Invents a Whole New Level of Awkward

Oh, Amy.

She said she wanted to make things as easy for Gary as possible, since calling off their engagement and immediately hooking up with Kyle again. Now what could make things easier for Gary? I know, living with his ex and having her showing up at his and Kyle’s shared workplace, of course! 

Amy, what are you doing? Nobody wants to live with their ex, and nobody wants to keep running into their ex with their new partner, especially when that partner is their child. It’s almost as if being with someone as socially inept as Gary has rubbed off on her and she doesn’t know how to be a normal person any more.

Off With His Leg!

If you’re trying to avoid spoilers, then skip this last paragraph.

A promo clip was released featuring Paul Robinson as Henry VIII, which was absolutely inspired. He’s about to marry Terese, which means he’ll walk down the aisle for the sixth time, and we’re being treated to all of his ex-wives returning ahead of the wedding. Clearly the best part of the promo clip is when they’re all yelling, “Off with his leg!” I do hope that whoever thought of that will get a pay rise, because they deserve it. Being a fan of Neighbours nostalgia, I’m pretty excited about all the ex-wives coming back. I’m not sure they’ll stick faithfully to the Henry VIII vibe and have any beheadings though, which is a bit of a shame…