I loved the opening to season four episode one but it’s too long to type out. What sums it up is Katy chose Reilly over Joney. Jonesy and Reilly miss each other. Bonnie calls the cops because the Skids, Glen, Jonsey and Reilly are fighting. Wayne’s dog Stormy is “depressed” and won’t come out of the barn so she can get pregnant. Wayne and Rosie are on the outs and Gail wants Wayne and Rosie to attend her birthday. It’s Gail’s birthday party and Bradley wants Wayne and Rosie to get their asses to the party. Reilly goes to see Katy and is torn apart by Wayne and Daryl. Bradley considers Wayne and him square because Bradley knocked out Daryl and Wayne knocks Bradley out.
Wayne, Dan and Daryl are discussing ants driving sea-doos. The McMurray’s are outraged that the hockey coach is trying to kill off the Canada Geese and they tell Wayne, Katy, Dan and Daryl who also become outraged. Reilly and Jonesy really, really miss each other. Everybody confronts about the coach about the geese and the coach just laughs. They get to work relocating the geese. Jonesy is trying to figure out what to do without Reilly. Glen suggests he be his altar man. Stewart suggests that Jonesy join them. Both Glen and the Skids are ridiculous. I am very surprised the coach doesn’t have a heart attack when he loses his temper. Jonesy ends up choosing Reilly. The coach calls off killing the geese.
Two new girls come to the Rez and start crap. They steal Axe and Slash from Tanis and Katy catches them selling smokes to kids and they call Katy a skank. Tanis is throwing a BBQ and Wayne, Dan, Daryl, Katy, Reilly and Jonesy are going. The new girls and the men they stole from Tanis do a BBQ of their own just to antagonize Tanis. Tanis and the crew give back attitude that they are served. Glen and the Skids try each other’s lifestyle. Stewart decides that Jesus is metal and that the Skids and Glen can share the parking lot of the Dollar Store. Tanis’s boys are starting want to go back to Tanis. The Degens pull up looking for trouble. Tanis’s boys come running back and there is a massive scrap with the Degens.
The stand up comic that visited Modeans failed miserably. Because of this the McMurray’s are inspired to sponsor a talent show. The first place prize is a $100 bar tab at Modeans. Dan is totally in and Daryl is forced into it. Katy and Wayne are the judges. First up is Gail. She recites a scene but makes it a sexual as possible. Wayne buzzes her. Next up is the coach. Someone cough’s and he starts over. Then someone sneezes and he loses it. Glen and some guys made a band called My Tattered Journal. They look like a messed up My Chemical Romance. Next up is the Skids. That was horrible. The McMurray’s do a Santa and naughty girl themed skit that was totally inappropriate. Squirrely Dan does his stand up comedy and was a hit. Daryl is last up with his line dancing. Everyone loved once Katy and Wayne got up there and other people joined in.
The McMurray’s throw a BBQ. They have quite the spread. They also have a kareoke machine and a hot tub. Everyone but Wayne congregates in the hot tub. They start a game of Never Have I Ever. It starts off sexually and doesn’t get any cleaner. Gail, Glen and Squirrely Dan seem to be having fun whereas Wayne, Katy and Daryl are trying to decide if they need to leave. Reilly and Jonesy realize there have been no gains in the off season and decide to do a half cycle of steroids. Unfortunately they mistakenly get rits (Ritalin) instead of roids (steroids) which was not found out until a student freaks out about not getting her rips. Reilly and Jonesy are freaking out. Everyone leaves the McMurray’s except Gail who lays downs the rules for the encounter.
Hudson and James Bay are returning to Letterkenny to do hay with their Dad and everyone is going nuts over it. At first there is tension between Tanis and Wayne because each wants to host the big bash for the Bays. They decide to combine the party and have it called Great Day For Thunder Bay. The Bays are late to their own party because they were busy getting laid. Great party though.
It’s Easter in Letterkenny and Daryl is going wild coloring eggs. It is Dary’s year to hide the eggs and Wayne, Katy and Dan have to look for the eggs. They have rules for this. One person colors eggs and hides them. There are clues provided by the host. When you find an egg you do a shot of Gus’ ‘N Bru and you chug a Puppers. No drinking til you find an egg. If you find a booby trap you are out of the game and get to drink as much as you want. Wayne wants to get out of doing this but Katy insists that “You don’t fuck with tradition” so Wayne is out of luck. Glen on the other hand is crying because he wants to do a “Passion Play” (kind of like the movie Passion Of The Christ) and Reilly and Jonesy decide to help him out. They get the Coach to yell at Glen which his laugh is super creepy. Stewart and Roald are by themselves today which causes Stewart to spiral into a depression. Roald tries desprately to find something to bring Stewart out of his funk. When Glen, Reilly and Jonesy show up he thinks he found it. Dan found the first booby trap. He and Dary are completely smashed and soon so is Katy. Wayne ends up calling over McMurray. Meanwhile Glen carries a big cross down the street with Reilly and Jonesy pretending to whip him and Roald and Stewart trail behind. When McMurray and Wayne find all the eggs they find a zombie walk going on outside the house and Stewart is ecstatic.
Best quotes from season 4
Do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life.
I’d rather be watching a hobo jerk off.
I’d rather be watching a ten man lemon party on and IMAX movie screen.
Go fuck yourself you silly fucking butt crusty.
I’d mix more bats than Betty Crocker.
Squirrely Dan, has it occurred to you that those two may be members of The Lifestyle?
Alright. Who wants to play pass the banana?
Do you do rips? Hard no.
I will submits that you have been guilty of humbuggery, curmudgeorry and dare I say it, poop-pantsery on more than one occasion.