When I first saw this movie, I came in with the wrong expectations. It’s a horror film, right? It has some vibes the same as the creepypasta Candle Cove and many VHS aspects based on the summary and the poster. I think I maybe expected some kind of analog horror. I only briefly watched the trailer and left the rest up for a surprise. “I can’t wait to see the supernatural horror”, I thought to myself. 

Instead, I was greeted with quiet liminality and found that I needed to correct my expectations of the type of film this would be. The score by Alex G cemented the aura of the movie and how it continued onward with gentle synths. As the credits began rolling, I sat quietly thinking about what I had just watched. I even spent the day in existential thoughts about my identity and browsed Tumblr for analyses that only showed light to the bleak one I originally thought of.

So I watched the movie again after I let it marinate in my head and this time I understood what I was watching and could enjoy it to a fuller extent beyond the neon visuals and the characters covered in a static glow. The reality was more clear than it was portrayed to be. It was more than a horror movie; instead, it was more along the lines of a coming-of-age film in which the main characters are seeking out their true selves.

After the second watch, I left the movie with friends who I had brought along feeling almost enlightened about the story. It’s truly a movie about trying to find yourself.

Colors and visuals, Pink, Blue, and TV Glow

I Saw The TV Glow has a background that is rich with symbolism portraying the main characters  with it’s coloring. Pink and blue are the traditional colors for each gender and they also convey the way that the main character sees themself. Owen is seen to wear pink during the moments when he feels like he’s questioning with his identity and the opposite color when repressing the idea of themself. There are also a variety of background objects that represent the themes within the movie:

Within the intro alone, there are several pink and blue visuals. The opening credits are in a pink font. When we are first introduced to Owen, the TV screen blinks from blue to pink in front of him. There is a parachute with the trans colors that billows around Owen and the other school children. While the parachute slowly deflates, unlike the others, he walks around as if searching for something.

Televisions are also a central focus in this movie. The majority of I Saw The TV Glow takes place during the early 90’s so we are greeted with many CRT televisions that emit a very distinct static. During this era of television, the only way to watch a show was when it was copied to a VHS or the moment it aired. The Pink Opaque is filmed with an old VHS filter reminiscent of those times which lands to an almost uncanny feeling, especially when the monsters that the protagonists of the show fight against appear. It is especially reminscent of analogue horror videos one would find on YouTube during the early 2000’s. Within the moments of the monsters, they are horrifying, but they are more unsettling than anything.

There are even brief references to the media such as Void High School spelling out VHS and the focus of the meeting spot between Owen and Maddie takes place in a dark room. There is a constant fuzz of media in the background when important conversations occur in the movie. There is an inherent nostalgia for old horror that this movie utilizes spectacularly. However, the horror is not in the monsters, but the innner struggles that the main characters face.

The Pink Opaque and Transfem themes

Owen is said to be representative of the character Isabel in the movie’s show called The Pink Opaque and feels a soul-binding connection with her. The same could be said for Maddie who relates to the other protagonist, Tara. The protagonists of the show each have a pink-colored ghost tattoo which correlates back to the themes of color and gender. The connection they share with the show could be seen as the obsession of media as was said by many critics, especially when the lines of reality in the movie begin to blur, but I believe it goes much deeper than that.

In the soundtrack, the title of the very first song is called “Anthem For A Seventeen-Year-Old Girl” which incorporates the same synths and haunting melodic tones as do most of the music. It describes the experience of a young teenage girl and how they can feels at odds with the rest of the world. Maddie and Owen have the bond that they do with one another due to how they feel like pieces of them are missing or don’t quite fit with the rest of the world. But while Owen is afraid of what lies on the other side, Maddie embraces it and is essentially reborn with the identity of Tara from The Pink Opaque. It’s just like how there are some trans people how readily embrace who they are at a young age while there are others who are stuck in a state of repression. And it’s this fear that lends to the horror asect of the movie.

The true horror in the film begins when we see Maddie flourish at the cost of killing her past self while Owen remains static. He fears what Maddie says is too good to be true and slowly withers away from the inside. The viewer can’t help but hope he takes the leap to find the answer about who he is even if some of his peers seem to deem it unusual. So he clings onto the last remnants of The Pink Opaque through the VHS tapes Maddie gave him until it’s no longer recognizable.

Media is one of the best forms of representation when it comes to the feelings of various groups of people and their struggles. Even talking about media always leads to new media which can influence people’s views on society for the better. It reminds people that they are not alone.

Conclusion

If there’s one main theme to take away from this movie, it’s that there’s always time to figure out your identity and be who you are. It may be scary and seem dangerous, but it is always worth it in the end. In one of the concluding moments of the movie, we see in the sidewalk chalk from the beginning written onto the asphalt that someone had added the words “There Is Still Time”. There is a culture in our society about how we are expected to have everything figured out about ourselves at a certain point but that is not necessarily true as shown through this film. It can take someone years to figure out themselves as repression can go extremely deep. And the best part about this realization is that there is no wrong way to go about being yourself. As many constellations as there are in the blow-up planetarium Owen and Maddie talk together in, there are a billion possibilities in who you could be.

This is the second film director Jane Schoebrun has made since their first film with similar themes called We’re All Going to the World’s Fair. They are non-binary themself and through their movies, they are trying to visualize the experience of coming to grips with your identity. And with that, I think they have done a fantastic job. I look forward to whatever they create next.

Have you seen this movie and had a similar experience? Let us know in the comments below!