Another seven days have flown by, which means it’s time for our weekly Neighbours recap. There are quite a few different storylines brewing at the moment, so it’s looking like next week might be quite action-packed.
I Have Some Feelings About Felix
I always seem to have an allergic reaction every time someone new comes into Neighbours because I usually hate them until I get used to them. I am not getting used to Felix, though. In fact, I’m disliking him even more as the weeks go on.
Despite the fact that he’s just got out of prison early, has lucked into staying in a very nice suburb with his brother, and has immediately walked into a job, this guy has a chip on his shoulder the size of a telegraph pole. I have sympathy for the fact that he seems to have had quite a tough childhood, but everything after that point has been his choice, in the same way, that it’s his choice right now to join forces with middle-aged teen Slade to do some light thievery at the building site where he’s working.
I do not understand what his problem is – where does he think it’s going to get him if he commits another crime while he’s on parole, apart from getting him straight back to prison without passing Go? And how is that going to affect Andrew?
Felix also knows that he’s JJ’s dad, and it seems like JJ somehow knows it on some sort of unconscious level because he keeps yapping around at Felix’s feet like an eager little puppy. He’s got a bit of a boy crush on the hardened criminal. He is desperate for his approval, so much so that he decides to lie for Felix, unprompted when Andrew asks the pretty reasonable question of where he was when the coffee shop got trashed (more on that later).
Andrew has made it clear that he’s asking all known criminals in the area where they were at the time, so it’s nothing personal. Anyway, what would it look like if he asked everyone except for his brother? Despite this, Felix has a massive temper tantrum in front of half the street, and this is when JJ steps forward and says Felix was with him. Honestly, this kid has never made a good decision, and he couldn’t have looked more like he was lying when he piped up with his fake alibi, either. I can’t wait for him to sweat bullets when Andrew asks him even the mildest questions about what it was they were doing.
Chelsea Plots To Trap Paul
When is Chelsea going? I’m so sick of her. Not content with moving herself into the penthouse and blagging herself a job at the hotel, she’s now trying to trap Paul by getting herself pregnant, so she’s ditched her pills and is jumping on him whenever the opportunity arises. She’s insecure about Paul’s feelings towards Terese, and she’s insecure and threatened by Krista because she’s good at her job. Plus, she’s even more insecure about her future with Paul since he made it very clear to her that he’s only after having a bit of fun with her.
I love a good villain, and nobody deserves to be a victim of Chelsea’s scheming more than Paul does, but I’m just really bored of her now. Can she just do whatever big thing it is that’s going to get her found out so we can have the big showdown and pack her off somewhere else? Although I am currently living for how much everyone hates Chelsea and how they don’t even try to hide it, I need her to jog on now.
Toadie In A Tent
Toadie is still bleating on about how he needs to properly explain to Terese why he ran off with his ex-wife at the very slightest provocation. He finally wears her down to the point that she agrees to have a conversation with him. She doesn’t instantly forgive him, which he is clearly expecting, and decides instead to go to Adelaide for a few days to see Piper. Toadie is bereft at the idea of her leaving town, so he leaves her a letter asking her to meet him at the place where they first got together on some sort of camping trip.
So off he goes into the bush with his little tent, like an idiot. I understand that however improbable it might be, this is how the two of them got together, but has he even met Terese? She’s not a camper. If I was trying to win Terese over, I’d take her shopping in designer boutiques, book her into a spa or take her to a fancy restaurant – I would not take her into The Outdoors™ (YUCK!) where there are insects and mud and where you have to poo under a bush. My notes for this episode genuinely read, “Why is Toadie trying to win Terese back by taking her camping? It’s the least Terese thing ever, and he’s just sitting there in a tent like a d**khead.” The truth hurts, Toadfish. This is Toadie all over at the moment, though, isn’t it? He’s trying to win Terese back by doing something he wants to do, even though doing what he wants is what got him into this mess in the first place.
Melanie Is Being An Absolute Lawnmower
As if Toadie’s little camping trip wasn’t sad enough, he hears someone approaching and turns around, expecting Terese. It’s actually Melanie. He can’t hide his disappointment, which is pretty hilarious. You practically see him deflate as he claps his eyes on her. So, the penny finally drops with Melanie, and he doesn’t want to be with her.
Melanie also gets herself into trouble with Nell because she was the one who told her where to find Toadie, and Nell is furious that Melanie is still trying to make her and Toadie happen after she’s already blown up Nell’s whole family once already. It’s not often that I’m rooting for Nell because I find her a little bit whiny and tedious. Still, I was thrilled to see her tearing strips off Melanie for continuing to interfere with her family when they’re all doing their best to figure out if they can rebuild it.
Holly and Melanie both conspire to be as clueless as each other when they both invite themselves to the party Wendy is throwing for Felix. First of all, you do not invite yourself to a party you’ve not explicitly been invited to – it’s bad manners. Secondly, you’ve got to expect the friend of the woman whose husband you slept with to be a bit icy towards you. Even Wendy, who is nice to the point of being deranged, is going to have a few feelings about you sleeping with her friend’s husband.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not holding Melanie solely responsible for the affair because it’s just as much Toadie’s fault, but she needs to act with a bit more tact and self-awareness. Why is she even still on Ramsay Street? Her shoulder is looking pretty good to me these days. She should use it to pick up her phone and call herself an Uber.
What In The Evil Twins Is Going On With Haz?
It’s been an up-and-down week for Haz. He and Mackenzie are getting serious and they say the L-word to each other, but he’s being very weird and evasive every time Mackenzie asks him any questions about his family. We find out that he has a mysterious brother he’s not mentioned to her before.
Mackenzie enters him for some sort of coffee award, which he wins (presumably beating the place in Anson’s Corner that does the good iced coffee), but then he comes into the coffee shop to find it’s been absolutely trashed.
Haz goes from despair to elation when he finds the neighbours cleaning up the coffee shop and getting it back in working order for him. Then he receives a message saying something like, “I know the truth about you,” containing video footage of a figure smashing up the coffee shop. Then the figure is revealed to be… Haz! Or is it? I mean, it clearly is Haz in so far as it’s the actor who plays him, but could this be some sort of evil twin situation? The shiftiness about his family, and his brother in particular, makes me think that we might have the soap classic of an evil twin on our hands here because why else is he getting all sweaty and weird any time anyone mentions them? I’m desperate for him to have an evil twin called Baz or something. What absolutely rip-roaring fun. If it isn’t an evil twin, I’m going to be very disappointed because I really want to see all the slightly awkward scenes where he’s talking to himself/Baz. It’s absolutely classic soap nonsense. I’m dying to see where this is going, I can’t wait for next week!
