Everyone is super open and honest about their feelings and they all tell each other the truth early on to avoid conflict and I don’t think that’s ever been done in TV before?
Feel my feelings, yada yada
Greg is doing really well in AA, sharing, being open, really being an adult and handling things well. He even goes so far as to promise his sponsor, Guardrail, that he would bring the donuts to the next meeting.
Junior miss table tennis champion for the eastern northern seaboard county district
Josh is still leaving his Karate stuff at Rebecca’s place and sending mixed AF signals all over the place. He gives her this giant kiss when he walks in but then blows her off to go watch football at Hector’s place. Rebecca is desperately trying to hang out with Josh so when he says he’s going to a “ping-pong cocktail-eria” on Friday, she lies and says she was a champion in some made up tournament with a crazy name to get herself invited.
Maybe This Dream
Paula struts into the office with so much swagger & a new belief in herself. She shares with Rebecca that she’s applying to Law School and after lots of jumping and squealing and chanting, she asks her to write her a recommendation letter. As Paula walks out, she has her very own DISNEY PRINCESS SONG MOMENT. Donna Lynne absolutely slays this song that gives her a chance to show off her INCREDIBLE vocals. I could go on about this song for days, like, who knew we needed a Snow White-ish song that also talked about vibrators and menstrual cramps?!
Darryl, sweet cinnamon roll Darryl, hears through the grapevine that Paula needs a rec letter so he writes her one INSTANTLY! Paula shuts him down but Rebecca still hasn’t written the thing and let’s be real she’s gonna f*** it up, so maybe Paula should be nicer to Darryl. IDK y’all I just love him so much.
Oh that’s funny, should I tweet that?
Rebecca hires Albert Tsai (RIPTrophyWife) to teach her how to play ping pong because obviously she lied and is terrible at it. He tries to give her advice as all young kids on shows do but she is not having any wise child nonsense, all she wants is sexy ping-pong tips.
It’s not a drug, it’s a potato
Greg is back at work and everyone is treating him with kid gloves but he just wants to act like everything is normal. His boss even makes an announcement asking everyone to be normal, which is the opposite of helpful.
From sexing a bush
Hector, Josh & WhiJo have all been summoned to Home Base by their buddy Greg because he wants to come clean & tell them he’s an alcoholic. As per usual, Josh makes this about himself and is hell worried that Greg found out about him & Rebecca and is here to put him on blast. Before Chan can spiral out of control, Greg starts singing a drinking song to illustrate the depth of his alcoholism.
Bless the hands that have rolled these tapioca balls
Josh is venting his frustrations to Father Bra (YAS RENE GUBE WELCOME BACK) who is telling him to definitely not tell Greg about the Rebecca thing. Then, as if God were listening in and trying to test our pal Josh, Greg and Heather walk in to the boba place.
Greg is “making amends” but he apologizes for eating all of her french fries and not that thing where he left her to go be with Rebecca with no regard for her feelings; she’s okay though, she’s going to apply the french fry apology to the other stuff.
This is where shit gets weird, Josh walks overto say hi and Greg, being a good friend, says that he’s sorry about the Valencia breakup and asks Josh where he’s staying. Josh panics HARD, starts rambling about staying at Josh Hutcherson’s AirBnB and just blurts out that he’s sleeping with Rebecca.
Heather tries to get him to react and actually feel his feelings, especially because he dicked her over for Rebecca. Greg is acting all cool and chill BUT HE’S TOTALLY NOT COOL AND CHILL. He rambles some nonsense and the “I Could If I Wanted To” music starts playing and there’s a tiny reprise in which Greg PUNCHES A WALL!
TGIF, Full House, Family Matters, *long pause* Step By Step
Paula is here to remind Rebecca about that recommendation letter she promised, which of course she hasn’t written yet. Becks promises to write it by 2am and begs Paula to not use Darryl’s letter. Then they sort of shit on Darryl for some reason, but though he’s RIGHT outside and hears everything so when Rebecca walks out, he spoils Game Of Thrones (she just started on season 1) for her. (Sean Bean dies in everything though so really Rebecca should have guessed that one)
Let’s share a Costco card
Rebecca is still practicing playing ping-pong. Albert Tsai tells her she’s getting better so she launches into an elaborate fantasy sequence where Josh is singing a Green Day-esque rock song about how cool she is and how much he loves her and also how much he wants to commit to her, with his penis. As the song ends, we cut to actual Rebecca sucking at ping-pong and Hector wondering why in the world all of his friends are in love with this girl.
You dreams are NOT dumb
Paula is doubting herself all because Rebecca is selfish as hell and forgot to write her letter. Scott is being a great supportive husband and really encouraging her, the way that Paula did for Rebecca last season.
There’s ONE rule!
Back at “Paddles” Rebecca is still bad at ping-pong and the guys are wondering where Greg is, Josh freaks out that they invited him there, hinting to Hector that stupid Josh stupidly told Greg everything. White Josh is confused so Hector blurts out that JoshBecca is a thing now. White Josh is offended that Hector knew before him but Josh is all “dude you’re super judgey.” This is where they get really worried about Greg, who was supposed to show up after his meeting.
WE CUT TO THE MEETING BUT GREG ISN’T THERE! THERE ARE NO DONUTS! EVERYONE IS AT A REAL LOW POINT
Good job you horny monsters
Rebecca comes over to them and Josh tells her that he told Greg and that now they’re worried he’s drinking again. Becks is like WHAT THE F——. She doesn’t actually say that because this is The CW but like it’s what she wants to say. White Josh is the unsung hero of this episode – he’s super wise and full of smarts and really deserves all the praise. Hector finally catches on that drinking isn’t allowed when you’re an alcoholic so he & WhiJo head to the various bars on East Cameron to find Greg, but they carpool to limit their carbon footprint.
Rebecca uses Paula’s spy tricks to find Greg, alone on a bench, watching some ducks. I want to write a recap of this scene and be all insightful and deep but honestly it just broke me. The honesty, everyone feeling their feelings, just everything about it, IT BREAKS ME EVEN NOW AS IT PLAYS IN THE BACKGROUND WHILE I WRITE THIS RECAP. Rebecca confesses that he broke her heart the night of the wedding and Greg confesses that he got that DUI the day after the wedding because he was driving to her place to tell her that he loves her. He asks if she’s happy with Josh and if he treats her well AND WE’RE ALL SHOUTING NO AT THE TV but Rebecca says yeah and so Greg wishes them happiness AND IT’S ALL SO SAD so Albert Tsai comes in for some comic relief, he needs a ride home and he’s been in her car this whole time.
You’re the greatest person I’ve ever met
At the office the next day, Rebecca hands Paula the recommendation letter and apologizes for taking too long, being a garbage person. Everyone is being open and honest this episode and I CAN’T HANDLE IT! Paula admits that she thought Rebecca thought her going to law school was a bad idea but Rebecca has depth now after talking to Greg (he’s so good for herrrrrrrrr ugh show give me my ship back) so she inspires Paula to follow her dreams and change her life.
You get the butt!
Greg shows up to the AA meeting with super expensive donuts from the new place on…GUESS WHERE…East Cameron. His sponsor is all JUST SHOW UP TO MEETINGS DUDE. And Greg promises he will try.
I DESERVE TO BE WITH SOMEONE WHO TREATS ME WELL
Clearly inspired by this thing where everyone is open about their feelings, Rebecca confronts Josh, telling him that she was just trying to spend time with him all week and that’s what all the lies were about. She possible finally knows that she deserves better and perhaps this Josh fascination can end now? She goes up to her room and smells Greg’s old sweatshirt, which is fine but also like if she’s going to romanticize & obsess over Greg now instead of Josh WE’VE MADE NO PROGRESS!
I will leave you with David Hull looking hot as hell in a Newsies hat because we all need to lighten the mood right now.
Tune in to an all new episode of Crazy Ex-Girlfriend tonight at 9/8c on The CW.