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Photo Courtesy of FOX

There are two ways you can handle being forced to lived in a small retirement-style Florida town: join a old women’s walking group or get frosted tips. I’d like to think I’d pick the former (walking groups are COOL). 

Jake and Holt are still stuck in Coral Palms, Florida as a part of the Witness Protection program. Holt (or Greg) has adjusted “well”: he’s the aspiring assistant manager at an arcade managed by the best boss ever aka Jorma Taccone and he’s friends with some fit old ladies (including Rhea Perlman). Jake (or Larry), on the other hand, is miserable. He thinks Florida is the stinky butt of America, misses Amy, and has a secret storage unit filled with files on Figgis. This is, of course, super dangerous for both Jake and Holt, and if their assigned U.S. Marshall, Maya Rudolph, found out she’d probably make Jake watch Failure to Launch 100 times. Holt also sees the danger in this, so he takes Jake’s files from him.

In an effort to get them back, Jake gets the job as assistant manager of the arcade and tries to make Holt as miserable as possible. In the process, both get tabletopped by go-carts and filmed doing so (by a woman wearing a shirt that said “Orgasm Donor”…idk why but that felt like a necessary detail). If this video were to get out, they would be exposed, so they put back on their detective hats and get the phone back from the lady…who only wanted to put it online because she wanted to buy a tanning bed. After wrangling some snakes and dodging advances from the Orgasm Donor, Jake was able to switch the phones. But not before Holt, once again, misjudged Jake and forgot that he often has a bigger and smarter plan cooking than he ever lets on.

They part ways for a while: Holt finally gets the assistant manager job (but only if he lays off the drugs) and Jake actually starts working at the ATV store, until Holt realizes he could never actually spend an extended amount of time in Coral Palms. He finds Jake, gives him back the files and decides that instead of pursuing Figgis, they should just let him come to them, so they release the video online themselves.

Will Figgis find them? Will we have to spend much more time in stinky butt Florida (Jake’s words, not mine)? We’ll find out next week in “Coral Palms, Part 2″!

PS: Hardcore missing the rest of the 99 this week. Hopefully we’ll get to see them next week in some capacity.