At the end of the season one premiere, Pamela panicked, stealing the boat and kidnapping Tandy. The others, on a life raft, drift to an unknown island. Tandy wakes up after being knocked out to find himself tied up and in Pamela’s care. Tandy is angry with her for her actions (for the obvious reason of stranding his makeshift family on a random island), but she thinks he’ll develop Stockholm Syndrome. Tandy pretends to know what that is, but asks her to explain it to Gary the volleyball. Once she explains it, he says that that’ll never happen, but Pamela tells him that it’s pretty common, and sometimes the people even fall in love. After she walks away, Tandy comes up with a plan to fake being in love with Pamela.
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Once on the island, Carol freaks out about the yacht sailing out of sight. Todd formulates a plan, but his plan is just to melt chocolate in a fondue pot. They hear a noise coming from behind the bushes, and Todd goes to investigate. He gets close, and a hand reaches out to touch his face. He continues walking forward, and the group wonders what he is doing. Suddenly, a strange, bearded man comes running at them. They freak out, but it turns out that he just wants to touch their faces too. Todd tells us that his name is Glenn. Glenn is psyched to be rescued, until he realizes that their boat isn’t coming back for them.
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Tandy starts talking loudly, faking delirium in a conversation with Gary. He tells Gary that he’s ‘crushing on Pamela so hard right now.’ Pamela eyes Tandy from the deck while brushing Jeremy. She walks in to check on Tandy, and Tandy pretends to pretend to hate her. (Yes, I know how complicated that sentence reads.) She asks if he is still thinking about what’s-her-name. He fake messes up Carol’s name a few times, calling her Pamela. He then yells at her to get out. Pamela walks away, shaking her booty.
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Glenn shows the group around his home, which is essentially just a bunch of nothing. Erica finds something resembling a makeshift sex doll and asks what it is. He says that he made her to be a platonic companion on the island, but eventually the lines did blur and she became a sex doll. He comments that he modeled her after Eva Mendez. Todd says ‘She was a beautiful woman,’ and Glenn mistakenly thinks that that means Eva had some bad plastic surgery. Erica asks how long Glenn has been on this island, and he says it’s been five years. Gail say that Eva’s face, along with the rest of her, died. Glenn gets upset and says that he doesn’t handle death well. No one knows how to break the news of the epidemic that killed off most of the world.
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When Pamela returns to Latisse Tandy’s eyebrows, Tandy acts overly sexy toward her and then starts singing Sailing by Christopher Cross. Pamela joins in. Once they rap it up, she asks him to tell her that this isn’t a trick. He responds “Trix are for kids, and I’m 43 years old.” The two exchange a kiss so gross that only former SNL costars could deliver. Soon, though, she makes it clear that she’s known he’s been faking it this whole time. She pulls a gun on him and says she doesn’t have patience for his games. Pamela leaves, and Tandy stands there, tied to the ship, thinking about his wife. Various items make him think of her, including nail clippers, which he says she made him use because his toenails are razor sharp. He decides to use his toenails to try to cut the rope.
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Glenn opens up about how the only thing that has gotten him through this time is fantasizing about coming home to his family.
Tandy sneaks up, ready to attack with a fire extinguisher. He tries to launch it at Pamela, but it hits the side of the boat, alarming her of his presence. Thinking quickly, Tandy grabs up Jeremy and holds him over the side of the boat. Pamela, pointing her gun at Tandy, tells him to go ahead and drop Jeremy because he’s an excellent swimmer. Tandy switches tactics, bluffing that he’ll eat Jeremy instead. Pamela doesn’t believe that he could do that while looking into Jeremy’s eyes. Tandy agrees, and then lifts the dog’s butt to his face, saying that that won’t be a problem if he starts there. The two yell back and forth at each other until Pamela drops the gun and slides it over to Tandy. Tandy takes the gun and heads for the wheel. He realizes, however, that they’ve gone too far from the island by this point, and he has no idea which direction to go.
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Carol sits out on the beach, gloomily. Glenn tells her that she just needs to have hope that someday someone will find them and they can light the signal fire. Carol decides to light it right now. Glenn is skeptical and wants to save it for when a plane flies by. Carol uses this opportunity to tell him that that is impossible because everyone else is dead from a virus. It takes a while for Glenn to process and cope, but finally he’s ready to start the fire.
Pamela holds Jeremy, feeling terrible for what she’s done, stranding the rest of the gang. Jeremy starts to bark, and Pamela seems to notice something too. She walks back and gets Tandy. We see a burst of light on the horizon — the fire started by Glenn and Carol.
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By morning, Tandy and Pamela have reached shore. He runs up and kisses his extremely pregnant wife. Carol introduces him to Glenn. Pamela greets everyone, and everyone walks away.
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They all want to vote to leave her on the island. Tandy tries to make them take it easy on her, but they don’t want to budge. She accepts that they are going to leave her on the island, but she asks them to take Jeremy with them. They agree, but Jeremy runs off. When Pamela walks away, Glenn questions their decision to leave her. Melissa says that he lived there for years and was fine, but Glenn points out that he had the hope of being rescued to keep him going. They look over at Pamela, trying to bite into a coconut, and Carol caves. They let Pamela come along, but once back on the yacht, they keep her in the life raft, tied to the back.
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Where to next? Back on route to Zihuatanejo? Find out tonight on FOX!
